What a Difference a Year Makes

This time last year, S-girl was filming a kids baking battle.  Wow.  I cannot believe it has truly been a year.  The older all the kids get, the faster time seems to move.  My sister had asked me for some of the pictures from the competition to use for her blog for some  super cute Christmas gift tags.  

And, it was at that point that I realized I NEVER blogged about it when it was actually happening.  Ooops......life....Christmas....a pandemic, you know?!?

It is kind of funny now when I see pictures of people clumped together without wearing masks. It seems strange.  That is sad.  

Anyway, S-girl auditioned by submitting a short video of herself showing off some of her treats and then talking about some of her favorite things to bake.  She was selected for the Holiday Kids Baking Battle competition.  

We went for an official photo shoot a few weeks before the competition.  There were flyers and posters up all around town.  She even appeared on a digital billboard.  

We all gained a bit of weight as she tried recipe after recipe trying to figure out the best one.  There were time limitations, so some of her more complicated choices had to be set aside for something that could be done more quickly in a room full of people that were also trying to use the same oven.  

  

She settled on an old fashioned lemon pie.  She picked that because it fit the time slot AND because both her grandma's have a love for lemons.  My mom makes lemon meringue pie every year for Christmas and Rainman's mom has "famous" lemon bars.  She was even featured in her local newspaper back when big hair was in.  

S-girl did not win (and yes, we all think she was robbed).  But, nonetheless, it was very interesting to be part of the filming and see how all those t.v. shows come together and how lots of stuff can be edited out so what you are seeing is accurate.....but, sort of not, at the same time.  

All in all, it was a good experience for her....but none of us are clambering for our next shot at fame.....because, it isn't really.....real. 

If you haven't already, go get some of my sister's free printable gift tags.  I JUST started my Christmas shopping this morning...so her timing was perfect.

Typical Homeschool Day Around Here

We have been homeschooling for a loooooong time....like 17 or 18 years.  I have lost track.

I think back to when we were so nervous to try it.  Rainman and I sort of took turns with one of us being excited and stoked to do it and the other freaking out a bit that we were going to ruin our kids.

I am happy to say that I can safely say that our children have NOT been ruined.

We are down to only 2 kids at home doing school....if you don't count the whole pandemic situation....that had all 6 at home doing school again!

I thought I would share what our typical school day looks like.  I know some people are considering continuing to homeschool after the pandemic situation settles down...and others cannot wait for everything to go back to normal with the kids at school all day.  I get it.  But, I will say, remote schooling and home schooling are NOT the same thing.  So, if you hated remote schooling and all the Zoom conference calls, but liked having your kids around and seeing them learn stuff, you may want to give homeschooling a try when fall rolls around.

Our "typical" day has changed many times over the years because....life.  You know, jobs, babies, illness, moves, visitors.  It is one of the beautiful things about homeschooling.  It is not this rigid by the book thing that has only one right way to do it.

Click through some of the links at the bottom of this post to see various versions of our homeschool rooms....including, but not limited to the dining room table, a swing, and a bed!

We have had times where we did home schooling as close to what Rainman and I remembered about our typical public school day.  We had desks and letters on the wall.  Then we realized that the letters on the wall were fine and dandy, but the kids actually did school every day on the couch....or at the kitchen island and the desks just ended up as a place to pile their junk.

As locations of where "school" took place changed, one thing that has stayed fairly consistent is our goal of creating independent workers/students.  We have always been good about creating a lesson plan that the kids can see and use that shows them what our expectations are in each subject for the week.

(The last column we fill in with elective type courses - like art or music)

This has been a good thing for the kids, but also for Rainman and I.  It has kept all of us on track and accountable.  It has allowed the kids to be independent.  Rainman has always worked a full-time job and for most of our time homeschooling, I have also worked and not "just" been a stay at home mom.  The majority of my jobs have been what I call "sweatpant" jobs, where I can wear what I want and work from home.  Sometimes I do have to put real people clothes on and leave the house, but mostly my work has been done from home.  The whole working from home during the pandemic has been business as usual for me.

What that meant for me, was being able to quickly switch from professional mode, to mom mode, to teacher mode, to math tutor mode, back to professional mode, to short order cook mode, to exhausted mom flopping into bed at the end of the day mode.

What that meant for the kids was that they didn't have to wait to do their school work if mom was busy.  They didn't need to wait because we had it written down in black and white what they needed to get done each day.  If they had an opportunity to work for someone from our church or do something fun on a weekday, they could just double up on their school work and all would be well.

This system has worked really well for us.  Rainman is VERY diligent in sitting down and breaking down all the work they need to get done.  I am happy to let him.  We use a mixture of workbooks, textbooks, on-line and hands on resources for our actual school work.  We have not stuck with one curriculum, but chosen bits and pieces of different things that we felt worked best.  I was blessed to be a product reviewer for The Old Schoolhouse Magazine for many years, so we got to try out lots of different products - many that I wouldn't have known about or been able to afford on my own.  So, we have a pretty eclectic mix of what we use.

These days, our school day, typically begins in the 9:00ish range.  I have relaxed my standards on this a bit.  There was a phase in our home schooling journey where I was much more strict about time.     I would march around the house making sure kids were up, forced to have breakfast and be at their desks by a certain time.  I have found I don't care as much anymore, as long as the work gets done.  I used to say that we would not start school any later than 9:00, but some of my kids are not morning people and if I allowed them to tailor their day a bit later, they did better on both their daily work and their tests.  So, I had to let go of the idea that letting them sleep until 11:00 was bad and made me a bad mom.  (It is not easy though!) Even though I have relaxed that rule a bit, it has not stopped me from lecturing them about how the world won't care if they are morning people or not and if their boss says they need to start work at 7:00 a.m., they had better do it with a good attitude.

I also do not make my children breakfast, unless it is their birthday or some other special occasion.  They are on their own.  I encourage them to have a little something, but some people just don't like to eat right away in the morning.  One of my daughters actually physically feels worse if she eats in the morning.   I must be getting old, because I am mellowing on this one too.

Back to our "typical" day.  I get up at about 6:30 a.m. every morning.  Let animals in or out as the case may be, feed a few of them, make the coffee, take my medicine and start my work day.  The various big kids that are working get up in the early-ish morning and head out to their day.

My mother-in-law moved in with us in January and needs help with daily activities because she cannot walk and is in a wheelchair.  I keep a baby monitor on my desk and she calls me when she wakes up which is usually about 8:30 a.m.  I get her up and ready for the day and S-girl who shares a room with her usually gets up around the same time.

S-girl is very internally motivated and organized.  She is not necessarily a morning person, but she likes to have goals and will diligently mark them off her list.  She is very structured in how she does things and likes to finish one thing before she moves on.  She has a system in the morning and likes to check things off her list - whether it is her daily devotion time, exercise, or school work.  She is very independent and has learned that she does better when her texts are read aloud, so when she gets to a subject like history, she will pop over to my work area and ask if (or when) I will have time to read to her.  Most of my work is easy to drop and pick back up again, so I pour myself a fresh cup of coffee and she sits down with me at the kitchen table and I read history and then we spend time going over the discussion questions in her book.

V-girl can sleep and sleep and sleep.  I usually try to let her because I know that is what her body needs.  But sometimes I can't take it and I have to wake her up while it is still morning!  LOL  Now before you ask, she sleeps in late regardless of what time she goes to bed....it just seems to be part of her nature.  I will say her bed time has gotten later during the pandemic with all the big kids home.  But, again, I don't really care.  You know why?  Because they stay up late watching Jeopardy or playing games together.  I am in bed and sometimes I can hear all 6 of them laughing and shushing each other from down the hall. That, to me, is more important than an early bed time. Anyway, she sleeps later and gets a later start.  Whereas, S-girl's goal is to be done with school by lunchtime, V-girl is usually just starting hers around lunchtime.  Again, though, this works for us, because then I don't have to divide my time between both of them and my work at the same time.  However, in the past, I have been able to successfully ping pong myself around and help the kids in their different subjects and grade levels.  It just meant that I didn't get as much of my own work done during those years - at least during "school hours".

V-girl  has a lesson plan and can still be independent, however, she needs a little more face to face teaching time still because if not, she will just plow on through and "get it done".....even if it is all wrong.  LOL  I have to be careful with her,  because if I get busy and just say, "Do you need any help? or "Are you understanding everything?"  She will almost always reply - "No, I don't need help.  I get it."   Then Rainman or I will correct her work and she will have done the entire thing wrong.  She is not big on reading directions all the way through. She has a tendency to sort of skim and glean what she thinks is the idea and just jump in and go for it.  (I happen to be married to someone like that too, so she comes by it naturally.) Like it does for Rainman, sometimes it works for her and sometimes it completely backfires.

I still make daily chore lists or piles for the kids.  This will sometimes incentivize the late sleepers to get moving a little earlier because the early bird gets to pick all the easy chores! (That is the beauty of the pile system....it is a completely random division of jobs.  It just takes a bit more work and planning on my part.)

Rainman or I will correct their school work in the evening and "go over school" with them if we didn't already doing it during the day.  We just go over things to solidify what they did well or show where they messed up.  We also assign "homework" a few times a week too, which are usually just extra worksheets for math or essay type questions in other subjects..

The other parts of our "typical" homeschooling day are just all the normal household stuff that you need to know how to do:  Dishes, cleaning, laundry, yard work, home projects, and cooking.  I also, as much as possible, try to have the kids be responsible for making their own phone calls/inquiries about things.  For instance, when they want to get their driver's license or permit, there are documents that they need from school.  I do not handle any of that, nor do I even look up what they need.  That is on them.  It is their license...or not, as the case may be.  Do they sometimes get mad at me because I won't "just do it for them"?  Yup.  I do make doctors/dentist appointments until they are able to drive themselves though.  See?  I am not a horrible human being.

We have had the kids all start being responsible for their own laundry in the 10-11 age range.  They also start cooking basic stuff like scrambled eggs and grilled cheese by probably age....6 or 7.  They have always helped us with yard work and home projects despite their dramatic  moaning and groaning.  Cleaning is a constant battle with 9 of us living here, but I think we do a pretty good job of balancing the line between  squeaky clean and gross.  The house is a little cluttered and lived in looking.  It is what it is.

When everyone came home because of the pandemic and I was cooking every night, Rainman made a brilliant kitchen chore chart that has made a huge difference.  Now, whoever is on kitchen duty that day has the job of putting the kitchen to bed (wiping down counters, washing dishes, starting the dishwasher).  There are still a few late night snackers and dirty dishes left here or there, but in general it is done.  Which is a wonderful thing for me so that when I get up at 6:30 to start my other work, I don't have to factor in an hour to fix the kitchen first.

I will say one difficult thing with all the big kids being home because of the pandemic is that they have disrupted our chore routine.  It is hard to assign chores to big kids who are working outside of the house or have a heavy school load.  But, if we don't, then the younger ones are resentful that they are the only ones cleaning even though they aren't the only ones making the mess.  It is just harder.  Our system worked really well, when the oldest 2 were at college and the middle 2 were in public school because we managed to get both our regular school work and the daily chores done before they walked in the door.  Now it is just...harder.

Does that answer your questions about our typical day?  If you have more, let me know.  People have made comments to me now that their kids are home because of the pandemic about how hard this is and they cannot believe I have been doing it for so long.  Well, I think the remote schooling that their kids are doing is different than what we have been doing for so many years.  I guess there are pieces of homeschooling that are hard, but overall, I feel like homeschooling is easier on both the kids and the families than public schooling.  Everything in public school seems too rushed and so competitive...but not in the right ways, if that makes sense.  I like that our home schooling ebbs and flows with life and we don't  have to worry about falling behind.  We just catch up when we can.  I like that my kids can cry over math or a bad test score in the privacy of their own home with their parents hugging them and wiping their hair back from their faces.  I like that some of the boy/girl pressure is a little more delayed at our household.  It still exists.  We don't live in a bubble and we watch t.v., but it is not in their faces all day every day, so things don't start too early.

Seriously.....got questions?  Ask away.  I guess I can be considered a veteran homeschool mom at this point, can't I?  How did that happen?

I found some of my old blog posts that also share a glimpse into our homeschool life at the time.  If you aren't sick of me yet, go take a look (even just to see how crazy cute my kids were!)

Homeschooling...Our Way

School!

Fitness When You Are a Homeschool Family

Back to School

This is the Very First Time

Quarantine Chronicles - Part 2

Things are getting back to "normal" here in Georgia.  Most things are re-open.  No libraries yet though.  Grrr.  

We were supposed to have a bunch of senior awards ceremonies and activities to attend this month.

D-man graduated from the University of Georgia earlier this month without a ceremony or fanfare. His ceremony has been postponed to October.

D-man's girlfriend, J-girl is an artist and did this rendering for him.  Pretty cool

L-girl was supposed to graduate high school at the end of this week.  She also didn't get prom or any of the other end of the year fun and games or finish our her senior varsity year in tennis.  Her graduation ceremony has been postponed to the end of June, but now only 2 of us get to go because they are reducing the amount of tickets available to each student.  

(As you can see from all her ropes, stoles and medals - we are missing out on a LOT of awards ceremonies!)
There is a piece of me that is heartbroken for them not to have these special moments.  But, an honest piece of me is rejoicing that I don't have to sit through both boring ceremonies right now.  I am horrible, aren't I?!? I really just want to hear my child's name and accomplishments.  I don't care about Tom, Dick, Harry or Penelope.  I don't.  I clap politely, but I don't care.  I also don't expect you to care that much about my kids accomplishments.    (Honestly, I brought a book to A-girls graduation ceremony and I read.  I did.  Originally, I was worried that I would feel a little rude, but people around me were talking and watching movies on their phones.  Reading seemed sort of tame in comparison.)

I have tried to make a few special memories for our two graduates though.  We surprised D-man and took him out for a steak dinner on what should have been his graduation night.  It was the day after restaurants started opening up again for in person dining, so it was interesting.  I had made reservations ahead of time, but there was a limit of 6 people per table.  I tried to explain to them that we were really a true family....like we all live together and everything.....all 9 of us.....but, they couldn't make an exception.  So, we sat at 2 tables with 6 feet between them....then proceeded to walk back and forth and visit with each other the whole evening.  The restaurant was packed with loads of people waiting for tables....because the tables were spaced for far apart they couldn't seat as many people.  The poor wait staff were run ragged and all red faced and hot because they had to keep their masks on.  They also had added work to do like sanitizing menus after each and every customer, salt and pepper and steak sauce could not be just sitting at the table....also because it had to be sanitized between each customer.  So, they had lots of running back and forth to do, because they kept forgettin that they had to bring back those things.  

I just realized that we all got dressed up and I didn't even remember to take a picture of us!  It was actually Grandma's first time out in public in about 2 months.  Ooops.

There is not much I like about public school, but I did like one of the local high school traditions called Senior Breakfast.  It is exactly what it sounds like, but in addition to food, they also have teachers and family write cards and letters to the students.  The idea is that they just sit and eat and read their special notes.  I contacted teachers, friends and family and asked them to write letters to both L-girl and D-man.  I wanted to surprise them, so I had people send them directly to me and then we plotted and schemed so the two of them never picked up the mail.

I was particularly proud of my cantaloupe graduates.

I truly surprised both of them.  They both got lots of funny and thoughtful letters (and a few monetary gifts).  They were happy.  I got true hugs afterwards.  I was happy.

We have been keeping busy having bonfires, playing games (anyone heard of Qwixx?), hanging out on the deck just chatting.  Nothing earth shattering, but still sort of awesome.

Other things we have been up to:

S-girl had her first birthday cake commission.  I helped, but not as much as I thought I would have to.  This is really mostly her handiwork.

I have been crocheting ear protectors for facemasks.

Grandma turned 92 on Mother's Day.  She got the obligatory birthday pancakes

 and then the kids made us fancy brunch/breakfast.

(I didn't even know my kids knew how to make crepes!)

We surprised her with a Zoom call with almost all of her kids/grandkids. It was chaotic and loud and we made her cry happy tears....more than once.    I made her 2 of her favorite desserts, strawberry shortcake and lemon cheesecake (She was sad that she blew out all the candles and didn't end up with any boyfriends.  She was hoping for a 90 year old millionaire!).  It was a very good day.

Another recent quarantine activity was that I got my first haircut since....I don't know...probably October.  My hair is pretty easy.  It is long and thick and I can usually pull it up in a pony tail or make something work between cuts. But, it was getting to be too much for me.  Super long and heavy and I was just done.  When I start to get headaches when I pull it up in a pony tail, I know it is time to chop some of it off.  So, as soon as salons opened back up again and my lady was ready....I signed up.

But, I have to say, all the new protocols almost ruin what is usually a relaxing treat for me.  I truly get my hair cut once or twice a year which means that  I don't feel too bad splurging on it.

You know how it usually works: They offer you a drink, you get a nice shampoo/condition, a little head massage while they work the product into your hair, a nice chat with the stylist, and leave looking fabulous.

My stylist, Kelly, used to work at a salon close to my house, but a few years ago she moved about 1 hour and 20 minutes away from me.  I followed her.  I don't really mind the drive though because she is worth it...especially when I only do it once a twice a year.

However, now....post COVID-19.....here is how my day went:

Arrive and wait outside the salon.  Put on my mask.  Be allowed in one at a time.  So, they can: take  my temperature; have me sign a waiver that I haven't been coughing/been near anybody coughing, etc; sent straight to the bathroom to wash my hands; then told which chair I could safely sit in.  Out came Kelly.  She was also masked and had a white, plastic "lunch lady" apron over her salon clothes, which has to be changed between each customer.  We talked about my hair through our masks, whilst complaining about our masks and the lack of oxygen.  Kelly sent me off to the shampoo bowl so her helper could wash my hair.  I sat down and I was asked to sit back, then her helper said, "I know this is weird, but I have to put a towel over your face."  Seriously?!?  I am already masked, now you put a towel over my WHOLE ENTIRE FACE?

Yes, they did.  It was black.  It was dark.  I felt like I couldn't breathe.  It wasn't quite as bad as my experience in the MRI machine where I had a little bit of a claustrophic panic attack, but it was NOT pleasant.  Where I would usually be relaxing and basking in being pampered, I was silently urging her to scrub faster and whispering in my mind, "That is enough.  I am sure you have rinsed all the conditioner out by now."  I REALLY couldn't breathe now.  She whisked the towel off my face when she was done which was all well and good, but then I couldn't see.  I felt like I was on one of those t.v. shows where the good guy has been kidnapped with a bag thrown over his head, transported to the evil villains lair and when the bag is finally whipped off....he kind of stands there squinting and blinking as the lone light bulb (in one of those cage thingies) sways back and forth....before matching whits with the bad guy behind the chair.   You know what I mean?  It was just like that, minus the guns and bad guys.

When I regained my sight, I went back over to the chair and Kelly started work on my hair.  This wasn't really relaxing either.  My mask got in the way of her cutting, so she had to carefully move the ear straps out of the way without exposing my face.  We talked, but it didn't feel the same.  Somehow, the world is just eyeballs and hair now.  It made me think maybe I should splurge and get those crazy fake eyelashes that are all the rage now.  If that is all I have to show the world, they may as well be long and luxurious, right? (except they would touch my glasses when I blinked.  Oh well, short stubby lashes are all the world gets from me, I guess)  I don't wear my mask much, but when I do, I have found myself announcing to people, "I am smiling under here....you just can't tell!"  Maybe I would be able to smize more with my eyes if I could have to those lashes.

The only part of the salon story that is the same pre and post COVID-19 is that I left looking fabulous.

To finish this never ending story, the rest of my day was also not relaxing.  I drove 1 hour and 20 minutes home (which thanks to Siriously Sinatra, Sirius Broadway, and Sirius 80s, was not a bad trip).  I got home and found out that I was supposed to pick up 2 of the kids at the church car wash.  So, I hopped back in my car - drove to church, got a free car wash, drove them home.  Came home where Grandma had been waiting for me to help her take a shower,  so we did that.  Then, Rainman wanted to show me the outdoor projects he had worked on that morning (ones that I have been asking him to do for a few years now).  Yay!  Walked outside.  Looked around.  Dogs joined us.  One of them, who shall remain nameless,  apparently ate something that she shouldn't have and instead of taking care of business in the great outdoors, proceeded to walk into the house and throw up on the floor.  Happily it was on the hardwood and not the rug.   So, I cleaned that up, then my cute new hair and I did a little cleaning, pulled out stuff for supper, and had a very late lunch.

How is your quarantine going?  Are you coming out of it?  Things opening up yet?  Having to wear masks?  

Quarantine Chronicles - Part 1

Many times in the last few months, I have thought about blogging to share stuff that has been going on over here.  Then, I would stop myself and think....who cares about what is going on in my world....besides me?!?

I have not changed my mind about that, but I still feel compelled to commit a few things to paper (you know what I mean) even if it is just for my own sake and to help me remember.

We had a few birthdays.

We had FANTASTIC trip to Minnesota in February.  The girls and I went and played tourist because I had come to the realization that only A-girl and L-girl had vague memories of Minnesota.  And really, their memories were scattered and mostly things like remembering when we had to go shovel the end of the driveway so Rainman could get home from work....only to have the snowplow go by and us having to do it all over again.  Not exactly stellar, heartfelt memories of my home state.

We stayed with my mom, but we tried to do different vacation-type things most days.  I had to laugh because when we got to Minnesota, we grabbed a bite to eat  at  Pannekoeken Huis and then headed to the famous Minneapolis Sculpture Garden.  We got out of the car and one of the girls said, "Man, I was hoping for some real cold weather while we were here."  I would say about 5 minutes or less....later....she turned to me and said, "Nevermind.  I take it back.  This kind of hurts."  LOL  Yup.  Even I, who have lived through many a year with wind chills in the negatives had become a bit of a pansy.  It was like -11 wind chill that day.  My face hurt.  My lips didn't really want to work and form words.  But, underneath it all, it was kind of refreshing.  I do have a lot of Norwegian blood running through my veins.  LOL

We went to a live taping of a local T.V. show, we went to Benihana, we did this super cool Game Show Battle Thingie.  It was just fun.  Stress free.  I even remembered how to drive in snow and ice - yay me!

Then we came home and the world began to change.

Public school kids came home....and my extra little bonus buddy got to stay home with his mom (special ed. teacher) and not hang out with us. I miss him.

College girl came home.

College boy worked at the dorm - so he quarantined by himself when he wasn't working shifts while everyone moved out of the dorms.

Then, college boy came home (and brought home a dog that he had fostered during the quarantine so he wouldn't be alone.)

Eventually, even Rainman was working from home.

I now have a full house with 9 humans, 4 dogs, and 1 cat living here full-time....and I don't hate it.

I have been cooking and baking.  We sit down to eat dinner together almost every night - because nobody has to run out the door to work, sports, church, etc.

I would say the majority of us LOVE the new routine of eating together.

A-man looked at me one night when I called him to dinner and said, "Mom!  Are we eating together in the dining room again?!?  Ugh....Why?  Nobody really does that anymore.  It is weird."

LOL!  Yes, we force that poor teenage boy to dine with us.  We are just those kinds of tyrants.

There really is a lot that I have loved from this weird time in our lives.

I love the unhurried days.

I love the togetherness.....it feels like our lives when I homeschooled all of the kids.

I love having time to feed my family.

I love our on-line exercise classes.

I love our bonfires or the nights we all just sit around on the deck and visit and joke around.

Daily life has not really changed for those of us that were already home-schooling....other than there are a lot more siblings around to help (or distract) us during the day.

What do I miss?

Going out to eat and going to church (which is also where I was able to see my friends).  That is pretty much it.

It is funny (or not) how different Rainman and I are.  I am hoping to retain most of our new normal once the quarantine rules expire.  He wants to jump back into our old lives of running around, sports, lessons, etc.  He is ready to take off as soon as the restrictions are lifted.  Opposites certainly attract (and eventually annoy).

I am going to try to post more and at least document this time of our lives for myself.  I am also planning a post on what "our" typical homeschool day looks like - just in case anyone happens to be interested.

In the meantime, stay safe.  Wash your hands.

My Birthday

I turned 52 this year and now that I am finally doing better with keeping my expectations low for how much hoopla there will be on my behalf, Rainman and the kids managed to do a pretty decent job of making me feel special this year.  Go figure.

Rainman attempted to take me out for a relaxing breakfast on my birthday.  It was a Saturday.  He had to work at noon (which means leaving our house by about 11:15 to make sure he gets in on time).  He kept puttering around the house and I kept pacing saying things like, "Shouldn't we get going?"  "Maybe we should drive separately so we won't be a in a rush."  He pooh-poohed me and assured me that it wouldn't be rushed.  (I am just like my mom in that regard - I can remember the rare times when we went out to eat after church to Mel-O-Lane.  Dad and us kids would wolf down our meals - chug the Mountain Dew (the only time we got to have pop!) - and be ready to hit the road.  There would be my mom sitting back in her chair just calmly sipping her cup of coffee and disgustedly saying to us, "Don't rush me.  I am enjoying my coffee.").  My point is, when I get to go out to eat, I am just like my mom.  I like to take my time, enjoy being waited on, and just relax. 

Remember these bottles?

When we got to my number one choice of locations, there was a line out the door (Luckily, I had kind of figured this would happen since it was now mid to late Saturday morning, so I had a back up place in mind.)  Off we went to my back up option number two....and...yup.....line of waiting customers outside.  So, yes, my birthday breakfast ended up being at Chick-Fil-A.  Good thing I really like Chick-Fil-A!

Unfortunately, between home and the three restaurant stops, Rainman and I had gotten into a tiff, so by the time we sat down to eat, he took my birthday card  out of his pocket and shoved it across the table to me with a semi-snotty "Happy Birthday!"

Anyone that has been married for any length of time, knows exactly what I am talking about, right?

It was a very sweet gift, but at the time, I felt like it was something unnecessary and way too expensive.  Notice I said "at the time".  But, more on that later!

The kids gave me sweet gifts this year.  S-girl and V-girl gave me small, thoughtful gifts - things I needed or would really use - a new hair brush - a bath bomb.  L-girl got new family pictures printed for our wall.  D-man and A-girl, broke college students, both said that they wanted to take me out to eat.  A-man is 14 and just sort of huddled around everybody else as my gifts were open.  I did get a hug and an "I love you" from him though.  I will take it.

I got Chinese take-out for my birthday meal and a foot massage and pedicure by my girls.  It was a good birthday.

Now back to Rainman's gift.....which was.....a night alone at a bed and breakfast.

Let me tell you about my life now that the kids are getting bigger.  When it is not sports season, I spend a lot of evenings alone....in my bed....reading....or taking a bath....whilst reading.  When I say "a lot", I really mean pretty much every night.  I have given up watching t.v. - with an occasional Netflix show here and there.  So, my evenings are very quiet and solitary - since everyone else still wants to watch t.v. or is just doing their own thing.  Every now and again, the kids and I will play some games, but pretty much, I think they feel they have spent all day with me and are done with me by the end of the day.

As I opened his gift in the middle of Chick-Fil-A, he said things like....I made sure it had a nice bath tub....and you can read on the private balcony, etc.

Sweet.

But, I thought....I do that for free every night at my own house!

He had actually looked at the family calendar (a rarity) and reserved my room so I wouldn't put it off (which I totally would have).

This is where he sent me.

www.sugarmagnoliabb.com

It was actually great.

Here is what I realized....I do spend a lot of time alone either reading or working, but I am also interrupted a lot by questions, having to referee disagreements, or having to use my Solomon type wisdom to decide what is fair in their quest for more computer time.  I see (or hear) the kitchen getting dirty and people not cleaning up after themselves, so even if I go to bed early to read, I know there will be a mountain of dishes in the kitchen just waiting for me when I get up in the morning.  When I awake, there are also just random piles of shoes and socks spread throughout the house - even an occasional pair of undies that have been  mysteriously abandoned by their owners.  

You moms will get the idea, I think.  While I read, there is almost constant chaotic background noise (music, t.v., laughter, fighting, cheering for sports, impromptu wrestling matches).  

Mental chaos.  

I almost always awake to...a messy house.  

Physical chaos.

At the B&B, I was truly alone.  Literally.  I was the only guest and the innkeeper doesn't stay on site.  So, I locked myself in and rattled around in that big old house by myself.  I did have a bit of work to do to meet a deadline, but I sat on my balcony and typed away.  The only interruptions were from me watching people walk or bike by in front of the house.  There were also occasional tourist stops in front of the house.  I felt a bit like a minor celebrity as I would stop my work to wave at them from my perch on the balcony.

When I finished my work and sent it off to my boss, I read.  

I sat in the massage chair downstairs for a LOOOOOOOONG time.  I took a bath.  I shaved all my bits and bobs.  I exfoliated.  I moisturized.  I read some more.  I used Door Dash for the first time and wasn't murdered. (My son, D-man recommended it because he works in a dorm on his campus and said they get deliveries from Door Dash all the time and he said  the guys seem nice and normal.  That didn't stop me from texting him messages like, "I did it.  I am awaiting my very expensive cheesesteak and fries...and possibly my murderer.  Just know that I love you....."   After my food was delivered, I texted him, "I am alive and unsullied". LOL  I crack myself up.)  

Really, the Door Dash thing was a bit expensive, but when you don't want to go out and get your own food/can't get your own food - it is pretty awesome.  I did it all from my phone.  I ordered.  I paid/left a tip.  They sent me a text that they had gotten my order.  They sent me a text when my order was picked up by the "Dasher", and literally sent me a text when my "Dasher" parked his car and was walking up to the door!  This is the kind of thing that makes me feel old and realize how good this younger generation has it with these kinds of things.  In my day, you had to drive in the snow, up hill both ways....to get yourself food. 😉  

Breakfast at the B&B was wonderful and unrushed and I could just take my time over my coffee with no pressure.  The innkeeper did pop in and chat with me a few times as people tend to do when they find out you have 6 kids....and homeschool.  It was definitely a splurge, but, great job, Rainman!

I am a teeny tiny bit ashamed that I did spend almost the whole time reading. Almost.  I was also able to spend time thinking and praying.  Again, something I "think" that I do at home, but in retrospect, I don't do it as often as I should and even when I do ends up rushed and....thoughtless.  It was nice to go a little deeper.

One thought that kept rearing its head was Rainman and I becoming foster parents....to babies.  My parents were foster parents for 25 or 30 years.  But, I have been reluctant to be a foster parent, especially for babies, because I remember how attached my mom would get and how she would cry when they would leave.  I didn't want to do that to myself, but, that is kind of selfish, isn't it?

Rainman and I are still mulling over the realities of bringing in extra tiny people to our family, so we shall see.  (Yes, we have been bringing extra little people into our family for years - but most of them go home at the end of the day)  I was thinking of the practical things like - we already have most of the "baby stuff" - we have a lot of love here - we all love babies - babies are portable so they could easily go with us to sports/school events/church with us.  We will see....we are very early in the thought process.  But, pray for us, will you?  Age is factoring into our thought process a bit.  I am a bit leery of losing sleep again.

I completely get that I am getting older.  But, I still forget.  Kind of like I sometimes forget that I am overweight and then I see a picture of myself....and think, "Oh yeah....that is right....I am fat."

Here is a recent example:  V-girl and S-girl decided that they wanted to paint their bedroom because it was too little girlie for them and too "Neopolitan" looking (like the ice cream - and it was....brown on the bottom, white chair rail and pink on top).

Anyway, the girls picked out a color and I got to work...thinking I would knock it out in a day.   This is where the "Oh yeah....I am old now" snuck up on me.  I did manage to get it done in 2 days (with the girls doing the little touch up spots for me because the thought of climbing up that stupid ladder one more time or even sitting on the folding chair and bending over to get the spots near the baseboards had me in a tizzy.  They also got paint on the ceiling and I just looked at it and said, "Meh....who will be looking at your ceiling, right girls?"  I was not climbing up that stupid thing one more time!)

It looks great, but seriously, I was sore from my finger tips to the tips of my toes.  I think the only part of my anatomy that was not sore was my head.  That is it.  Sad.

So, then I think, what am I  even thinking by considering taking in extra little people that I will have to get up in the night with?  But, then I think about those poor little babies and think, if not me...then who?  Will it end up being someone that doesn't love babies the way my family loves babies?  I love how V-girl has gotten to be a psuedo-big sister to the extra kids we have watched for the past 5 years.  You don't really realize the natural life skills that are taught when there is a younger sibling around.  Even the simple ones, like being aware of someone else's needs or having to wait for the baby to stop crying or get their diaper changed before you can ask your mom a question.  Little things that are actually quite big.

Selfishly, again, I think of the fact that I am finally getting back to my singing and am enjoying being in 2 bands.  I have time to write and have gotten some articles published with  more possibilities looming.   Will those things go away if we take on part-time/temporary care for babies?  I don't know.  Should I even consider those things as part of my decision?   

Anyway, happy birthday to my rambling self.

  

Summer Recap

Summer, here in Georgia doesn't end on Labor Day with temperatures still in the 90s....summer will still be here awhile.

But, here are some highlights from our summer, thus far.  Lots of good stuff...and a few not so good things sprinkled in the mix.

We didn't take any family vacations although about half of us made it up to Indiana for Rainman's family reunion.  We did a lot of hanging out and chatting on the back deck, swimming in the pool, and sitting inside in the air conditioning when it was too hot.  Boring to some, but not to me.  I was in heaven with all 6 kids home again (although, don't tell anybody, but sometimes it did get too loud and wild for me...sometimes they get along a little too well.  ).

D-man got a summer internship in our county, so we got to see a lot of him.

Sometimes he even got to surprise us and come home for lunch in his spiffy big boy clothes!

He is starting his senior year in college and is planning to take the LSAT this fall because he is thinking law school year near.

A-girl got a summer job literally the day after she moved home from college and didn't look back.  She worked the whole summer.

We still got to see a lot of her this summer (and discovered one of the best thrift stores we have found down here in Georgia.  They have 10 cent days!!!).  She is starting her sophomore year in college and managed to get more scholarships this year than she did her freshman year!

L-girl went to tennis camp, went on a few mission trips, worked as a nanny this summer and sprinkled in a few odd jobs here and there. She was busy.  We didn't see a whole lot of her!  She just started her senior year in high school.

A-man is a freshman in public high school this year.  He had a bit of an adventure this summer at a youth group pool party.  He and one of his friends were playing catch with a baseball and A-man jumped for a ball over his head and caught it.  When he came down, he found himself, impaled through his shoulder on a wrought iron fence post (in through his armpit - out through the top of his shoulder)  Yes.  Yuck!  It was a first (and hopefully last) ambulance ride for him....and for me....I got there just as they were getting ready to pull away.  Here is the miracle though - which a few of the doctors even acknowledged - no major arteries were struck - no major nerves - no bones.  His surgeon said it was almost like everything important just moved out of the way as the fence post went in (like Moses parting the Red Sea).  He had a few of the doctors look deeply into his eyes and say that they hoped he realized how amazing it was that his injuries were not much, much worse.  It really is amazing.  The medical bills have started arriving, so that is fun too.  I just have to keep reminding myself that A-man is here and doing great.

S-girl was part of the church youth group this year so she finally got to go to the summer fun events and the mission trips.  Seems odd that she is old enough for all that stuff, but she is.  She even sent in an audition tape to be on a local kids cooking competition show.  She wasn't selected, but if you know her at all, it was huge that she had the courage to put it together and send it.  Huge.  She just started 7th grade and is still at home (yay!).  If things keep going the way they have with the older kids, I will only have her at home for one more year after this one.  She is already a fantastic golfer, so I am thinking she will be off to play high school golf.  I cannot believe that.

Poor V-girl was stuck at home with us all summer.  She so wants to be one of the big kids.  It really chaps her hide that she is too young for some stuff.  She started 5th grade this year. I am so happy that I will have a few more years with her at home full-time.  The adventures she and I will have...but, I think we will both be a little bit lonely!

Three of my extra kids left me and moved to Texas.  I am equal parts sad and excited.  Their dad had moved there for a new job and mom/kids stayed here for awhile while they sold their house and he got settled out there.  I was so happy when the time came that they could go join him in Texas and be together again - but, man it hurts too.  I have been watching the girls since they were about 3 months old (and the same with their little brother). It is hard to let go of being part of their everyday life.

I still have one of my extra kids left, but he will be heading to full-time school at his mom's school next year.  Everyone is leaving me.  (sigh)

We did manage to do a few things with all 8 of us this summer - which made me very happy.  I know those are going to get harder to come by as my people keep heading out into the world to become their own people.

So that is our summer update.  I am so ready for sweater weather, bonfires, hot chocolate, and boots....but it is still supposed to be in the 90s here all week.  And, let's be honest, it is barely sweater weather here in January - but a girl can dream.