The Whole Spaghetti and Waffle Thing

Have any of you read the book, Men are Life Waffles, Women are Like Spaghetti?

I haven't read it, but I have a few friends who have and they have explained it to me......(I'm not a doctor, but I play one on T.V.  )

In case you have never heard of it and have no idea what I am talking about, here is a video clip that explains the concept by the authors, Bill and Pam Farrel.

It is true.

Rainman and I are so different.

We have trouble talking to each other....without one of us getting frustrated, or, let's be honest here....angry.

Rainman thinks of one thing at a time.  He does one thing at a time.  One little waffle square at a time.  You know?

I don't do that.

I can't do that.

I have got noodles all over the place.  (Sometimes literally with the little people I live with! )

I usually do a pretty good job multi-tasking and keeping track of all of my noodles.

Lately though, I have been longing to be a waffle....even if it is only for a little while.

My problem is that I have so many things(noodles) to think about and try to accomplish that I am not getting any of them done.

Right now, I am trying to:

• Plan for school (starting next Monday) 
• Find all the books/supplies needed for next Monday (I know they are here somewhere....)
• Support A-girl (she started a more traditional school this week with D-man)
• Get my bookkeeping work done for the company I work for
• Type up the invoice for D-man's lawn mowing business (I know....he should do it himself, huh?)
• Try to come up with a MicroBusiness or two for myself 
• Decide whether or not having a renter in our basement apartment will be a good thing or a bad thing (Anyone know of a nice little old lady looking for a new home?  Does she like kids?)
• Try to pick and settle on a paint color for my kitchen cabinets....island....various furniture pieces
• Try to commit and actually hammer a nail into the wall and hang stuff up around here
• Organize my living room in a way that doesn't have it overflowing with furniture and bookshelves, but has the things I need nearby
• Figure out how to give my bedroom a makeover without spending a ton of money.  Romantic or cute? 
• Keep things clean
• Restart past chore systems, so I am not the only one keeping things clean
• Remember to mop the bathroom floor
• Eat my new way, which has been great - but requires lots of planning and thinking ahead (Trim Healthy Mama)
• Read  Insurgent  and Fault in our Stars.....plus many, many other Non-fiction selections that are waiting for me
• Remember to pull weeds and trim bushes (or assign that to someone)
• Learn new songs for praise team
• Use products and remember to take notes for writing reviews on them
• Keep track of my review deadlines
• Wonder if my friend, Sherri, is having a great trip to see her family
• Be Samson, and get started writing a book (which I think will just be a compilation of things I have learned in life.....mistakes I have made.....stuff that works for our family.....funny stories from my blog)
• Decide if the above book makes sense and if anyone would actually read it (should I care?)
• Figure out how to update the cover picture on my blog
• Try to remember to get my kids to pose in front of our fridge at the new house
• Organize our craft/sewing room so it makes sense and we can easily find/see all our fabrics and yarn
• Remember to do laundry (before I walk into my bedroom at night and see the pile that I have meant to wash for the last 2 days)
• Not to get too tied up in my lists and my computer that I forget to just love on my kids and play a round of Old Maid when they ask me to
• Not miss my family too much(visits are bittersweet and I just got back from seeing them all)
• Tell the lady from A Love Beyond Borders that we just can't afford to adopt those 3 sweet little girls....
• To figure out a way for us to adopt those 3 sweet little girls
• Research whether A-girl's fruit sensitivity is actual an fructose allergy
• Decide whether to intervene in the current sibling fight I hear in the basement
• Try to work on all the things the financial planner told us to work on, so Rainman can actually retire someday
• Schedule eye appointments for Rainman, D-man, and A-man (who has been getting headaches)
• Get physicals for Rainman and I scheduled so we can get our reward from our HSA account....I think I have until September 1st....oh, that is almost here, isn't it?
• Figure out a way for my waffle hubby to understand me better....and vice versa.....

So, you get it now, right?

I just want to go paint my kitchen cupboards.....without thinking about the 50 other things touching my noodle.

Then.....when that is 100% completed, I want to read a book.

Then.....when that is 100% completed, I want to teach my kids.

Then.....when that is 100% completed, I want to write a book.

Who am I kidding?

That would drive me crazy.  I actually can't even imagine living like that.

It is just frustrating right now because I feel like I am thinking about so many things and trying to make decisions about so many things....that I am actually accomplishing.....nothing.

I just need to use one of these little noodle portion thingies.....

(I will take the little man sized portion, please)  Image courtesy of Reykjavik Cornerstore

.....and just try to handle those noodles on my plate before going back for seconds...or I turn into this....

Keeping It Real....and Perhaps a Little....TMI

This morning, I was standing at our copier making some copies for our school day.  As I waited for the printer to warm up, my eyes wandered to the areas that I could see from my printer.

I started an internal, silent rage.....at my children.

Uggg......

Kids book, bigger kid book, embroidery thread for bracelet making....

Kid book, Ziploc baggie with an unmade craft, plastic golf ball, empty cocoa container, empty plastic bag, and a....knife....

One croc....honestly....the other one was nowhere that I could see....nowhere!

Captain America shield, Guitar Hero guitar (we don't even have any video games), 2 socks....that don't match each other, a pair of broken headphones, 2 box/suitcase thingies....and, well, my shoes.

Body spray/spritzer, the rubbery part of swimming goggles, a Christmas coloring book, a piece of a baby toy and a very old package of baby wipes (seriously...not even sure where those came from....we have been out of diapers for about 2 years now!)


So, you get it, right?  I was silently seething.  I mean, how hard is it to put things back where they belong? Where did they get this idea that you don't need to put things back where they belong?

We finally have a house that has room for us....and our stuff....there are places for just about everything now. Really.

I had worked myself into a really good lather about it.....they were going to get a stern talking to when they got up.

But, then.....I looked at my dining room table.  Those are L-girls' flip flops....ON the table....but that isn't what I saw when I first looked.  I saw the white thingie in front......

Yes, my friends, this is probably a bit of a TMI situation.....but that is my bra neatly folded and left on the dining room table.

No, I hadn't been folding laundry.

I had taken it off last night when we got home from church and wanted that puppy off and soon as I walked in the door....so I did the old Flashdance move and took it off while still fully clothed.....but my room....waaaay down the hall.....seemed too far away.

So, I folded it up and put it there.....just for now....and there it was this morning......saving my children from one of mom's lectures.

I guess I know where they get it from.

Sigh.

Chores! Yuck!

I am fairly certain that this is how every person alive really feels about chores.

I know I do.

I know my children do.

I don't think Rainman thinks too much about them......except when they haven't been done!

I have tried various things through the years to help keep on top of chores....or even to make them more fun.

They have worked with various success.

One attempt that has sort of lasted the longest (even though I sort of pick and choose what aspects to follow), is FlyLady.

I get overwhelmed with the e-mails from them that are supposed to encourage me....even though I switched to the one a day method.  So, most of them end up just deleted....but, when I do take the time to read them, they are encouraging....so I don't remove myself from their mailing list.

My latest attempt at assigning chores to the kids was actually pretty successful....but it involved me having to think.  And, quite frankly, some days, I am just not in the mood to think.

Here is how that would work.

I would take a look around the house at what needed to be done.  Somethings were on the list everyday (sweeping the kitchen)....some were just because we hadn't paid attention to them in a while (shoe area or piles of "stuff" on the stairs).

I would try to come up with a certain number each day so the chores could be given out equally....one per child, two per child, or three per child...keeping in mind that V-girl (even though she thinks she is just like the big kids) can't do things the big kids can.  She would usually just get 1 or 2 easy chores that I would give her from her "special" pile.

Then I would write the chore on a little cut up piece of scrap paper and divide them into piles based on the number of jobs per kid.....like 2 jobs per kid equals 2 piles.

Then I would hold them out like playing cards and the kids would pick their jobs. 

Pick a card.....any card......

This method resulted in far less complaining than when I assigned them specific jobs.  Although I did have to put a moratorium on trades because there was definitely some unfair trading happening behind the scenes.

Like I said, this system was pretty good.  Not great.  Pretty good...as long as I was in the mood to think.....and could stand to hear whining if there were 3 piles instead of just one. 

That was a loooong introduction to now tell you about a review product we got to try as part of the Molly Review Team. 



The "Molly" team is an extension of The OldSchoolhouse Reviews that I already do.  The Molly Crew reviews items that aren't curriculum related. It's more of gardening, kitchen gadgets, and just general household or money saving ideas.  Except for the gardening.....stuff that is right up my alley.










It is called The Everyday Chore System put together by Everyday Homemaking - Practical Ideas for Busy Families.


The Everyday Chore System.


Doesn't that have a wonderful ring to it?


The Everyday Chore System.


Can you hear the choir singing?


Sigh.





It was really everything I had hoped....and more.


The Everyday Chore System is about  a 90 page e-book.


This book is a hit.  I loved it. 


I will tell you even though I loved this book from the moment I printed it out and started reading it (there are some e-books that I have to be able to hold in my hands)....I didn't get started with the chore system right away.  But, I will tell you more about that later.

So, why did I love this before I even started using it????

And, how do I tell you about it without giving all the secrets away????


Well, here is my attempt at titillating you with just enough information to make you want to try this system out for yourself.


The book had me at "hello". 

In the introduction to this book, written by the author, Vicki Bentley....she titled this section of the book:

Who is this woman, and why is she telling me this?

She goes on to tell a story about when she knew how she was training her kids to help run the household had paid off.  A time when she was unexpectedly called away because of her sick father.  Her girls stepped up in her absence and kept things running, smoothly. 

Do you know what that means?  She did not come home to a huge mess.  The schoolwork had been completed.  Their chores had been done.  They had brushed their teeth.  The girls had handled everything.

Now, before you accuse me of being sexist....because I said her daughters stepped in and ran the household......she only has daughters.....8 of them, to be exact (plus lots of foster kids).


I read this book quite a few times and picked up different little tidbits each time. 


The whole first part of the book talks about child training being the first step to successful home management training.

And, to quote Ms. Bentley...

"I hesitated to even call this The Everyday Family Chore System (partly because I didn't want it to be misperceived as a How-To-Make-Slaves-Of-Your-Children system!)...."


Wait a minute now......What is wrong with making slaves of your children?  It worked for my parents!  Ha!  Just kidding!  (Love you, Mom!)

Anyway, for a few tidbits....

Not sure of God's will for your life?  This is one sure answer:

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.
                                                                                                       - I Thessalonians 5:16-18

She goes on to talk about the expectation for the kids that work will be completed with a pleasant attitude, thoroughly, and reasonably well....according to their ability.

I know.

A pleasant attitude.

Is it possible?

Is it even possible for me?

Somehow, both my children and I can work diligently and pleasantly if we are at someone else's house, cleaning up someone else's things.....but can't seem to muster up that same work ethic and attitude at our own humble abode.

Why is that?

Anyway.....she is also a proponent of consequences for a job poorly done.  Sometimes even monetary consequences.

(Dum...dum....dum.  Or do you write that....Duh....duh....duh.....or.... dun....tu.....duh.....)


But, the basic goal of all of this is to train your children to be responsible, skilled, and diligent.

Have you ever wondered at what age your kids should be able to do certain things?  Like brush their teeth?  Do their own laundry?  Change a flat tire?  Change a furnace filter?  Plan a budget?  Get themselves dressed in the morning?

Ms. Bentley has a "Life Skills" list included in this book that gives you an idea at what age to start training in these kinds of things and the age at which they should have it mastered.

(I may or may not have gotten in trouble with a teenage friend of ours, when I shared some items on this list with her mother.  Oops!)


Listen to this this nugget - Regarding motivation for success: 

Kids do what we inspect and not necessarily what we expect.

Read that last statement over in your head again.  You know it is true, don't you?


The actual system is working quite well for us....although I am still tweaking it a bit, so it matches the way our house is set up.

She does use of bit of FlyLady's methods and mentality, especially on cleaning by areas or zones.  Which is probably why I liked this system so much, since I have already been following the Fly Lady mentality around here.

I mentioned earlier that I didn't get started on this book as soon as I could have. 

Why?

I read it.  Read it again.  Took notes.  Got ideas.  Read it again.  Made some lists.  Read parts again.  Thunk some thoughts.  Did a few sketches of what I wanted my chart to look like.  Went over some parts of the book again, and finally.....

I started on my chore chart.  For some reason, I wanted my chart to be beautiful and perfect before we even started.

If you are familiar with FlyLady....you know that is those kinds of perfectionistic tendencies (like wanting a cute chore chart) that get us in trouble when it comes to keeping C.H.A.O.S. at bay.

Any idea what C.H.A.O.S. is????

Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome.....because your house is in such disarray.

I took two big ideas away from me with this book.

One is to make sure the kids understand what you expect of them.  For example, if I give them the assignment to "tidy" their room.  Their idea of what this means and mine, are two totally different things. 

So, now they each have a page protected list of bullet points taped up in their room, as to what I mean when I say "tidy" their room.

Simple?  Yes.  Effective?  Definitely.

The other big thing I took from this is to use the How To Do It cards.  Which are exactly what they sound like.....again, helps the kids realize just what exactly you are expecting.  Then, of course, you have to "inspect" too.

I wish I would have had a laminator or had gotten clear Contact paper (as she suggested) to make my How To Do It cards a little more....ummm....sturdy. 

I have had to print out a few new sets of A-man's cards.  He carries them with him like he is supposed to, when he is doing his chore, so he can make sure he is doing the job correctly and isn't forgetting any steps....but, then instead of going back to my cute little chart, they get set down.... in our good old Georgia clay...or, on the kitchen counter, where, of course,  a watermelon is set down on top of them and cut up....a juicy watermelon....if you catch my drift.


Oh, I forgot one little thing that it great about this system.  It gets all of those little weird jobs done as you go along....so you don't ever really have to do a big spring cleaning (not that I ever have really done that anyway....but, you get the point).

Those weird little jobs, like cleaning out the toaster, or washing the walls in the dining room, or scrubbing the baseboards in your bathroom.  Maybe those aren't weird little undone jobs at your house....but they are at mine!


Ms. Bentley also has an Everyday Cooking book that sounds awesome too. It is actually the first book in the Everyday Homemaking series.



I am actually planning to get it, partly because the other reviewers have talked about how good the recipes are, but also because with a large family, I assume the portion sizes will be right for my family.....that doesn't happen very often.  Her books also focus on whole foods type cooking, which is something that I am trying to do more of with my new eating plan (more on that later....planning some "before" and "during" shots....we aren't to the "after" yet!).


You can get The Everyday Chore System book for $19.99.  If you want the e-book version and just print it yourself,  you can get started immediately on making your own perfect chore chart, for $17.99. 

You want to see how cute, and almost "perfect" my little chore chart turned out?

Here you go!

(I blocked out the kids names, in the center, that you don't know  - but trust me, even that part is cute!)

Let me show you the top of my chart a little closer....

Don't just believe my word on what the other reviewers thought of Everyday Cooking....or even what I thought about the Everyday Chore System.  Go take a look for yourself.


Disclaimer:  I received a e-book version of The Everyday Chore System for free, in exchange for an honest review.

The Big Basement Reveal

Okay.

I know it really isn't that exciting, and honestly, I think you can tell a much bigger difference in person.

But, I don't hate going downstairs like I used to....so there.

To recap, the basement used to have dirty, stinky, smelly beige carpet.  It was pretty bad when we moved in, but I felt bad that the owners had to come down in their price after the appraisal, so we didn't ask for carpet or a carpet allowance.

It was pretty bad when we moved in and my little darlings made it really bad.    Lots of contraband food and drinks were spilled and left to die a horrible death on that carpet.  You see, because mom hated going down there....mom didn't really inspect a lot.  So, they could tell me that it didn't look that bad down there and I believed them.  Foolish, foolish mom.

The basement had sort of an old urine smell.  Not completely sure if that is from the previous owners dogs.....or....my children.  I hope it was the dogs....but I can't honestly say!

It was dark down there.  One side of the basement has no windows and it had one light/fan fixture in the middle of the room with only one working light bulb socket....oh and my kids managed to break the fan so that doesn't work either.

It was just bad....plain bad.  Looked bad.  Smelled bad.  Made me feel bad.

Here are some before shots.

After we got rid of some carpet...and a bit of Rainman's bachelor couch.

The other end of the room....that is Rainman's bachelor T.V. facing the wall back there.  It died about a year ago....and there it has sat waiting for us to get rid of it.  The glass is to the wall because I know my children.

A closer shot of the bachelor couch.   My kid's didn't just destroy this puppy without permission.....well, some of it was done with permission.   I wanted to keep some of the stuffing for craft projects, so, being the coolest mom in the world, I told them to have at it and get me some stuffing!  They obviously had a great time.

Okay....so, I think you get a bit of an idea what it looked like down there when the children were pretty much given free reign. 

It obviously wasn't pretty.

So, we pulled up all the carpeting and I painted the whole thing....we got a few new IKEA desks....rearranged what we had....took a trip to the dump and....here we are today!

Three of our work stations and our reading library.

This is my curriculum shelf.  I have a shelf for math, for science, for history/geography, language arts, religion/theology/apologetics, foreign language, SAT prep....you get the idea....but it is all together in one place....I cannot tell you how happy that makes me.  Since it is all here, I can't forget about what I have, so I am using more of my stuff! 

Here is the whole overview of the school side of the basement.  D-man's work area is the closest on the left side.  S-girl's desk is in the middle of the curriculum shelf (another IKEA purchase from a few years ago).

This is my reference library!  I know....I am a nerd....but it makes me happy.

Here is the other thing that makes me happy.  There was a little closet under the steps and we have stored all of Rainman's VCR movies that he can't bear to get rid of in here.  But, also all my pencils; pens; glue; tape; pencil sharpeners; colored pencils, etc.  Again, all together in one place!

This is the other side of the basement...next to the school room.  We have games and puzzles in the two tall cabinet thingies.  Obviously a T.V.  And the latest addition is one of our twin beds from upstairs that wasn't getting used (remember we have bed hoppers).  And, of course, a big heap of toys in the corner.  We need to do another purge...but I am too exhausted right now!

I kept the floors just plain concrete.  I had wanted to paint them ....but money ran out....so it is fine for now.

We had a great friend who put in some new recessed lighting for us.  I bought them for really cheap at  Habitat for Humanity Restore.  I didn't even have to pay him with money....I just made him some Polish food!  The lighting difference is huge.  It used to be kind of dark, dingy and scary....now it is light and bright......

.....and, apparently good for naps!

A Random One

Not feeling very capable of pulling together a cohesive blog this morning, so thought I would share a few random moments from recently.

We love our new (to us) little pink vacuum.  There have even been incidents of fisticuffs over who would actually get to use it. Not really....but is is a very popular item in our household.

By the way, our Christmas stuff has been taken down and put away now.

Modeling their new dresses from Grandma.

Having lunch in their restaurant.  The unusual part of this is that this time, it was A-man idea, and he served everyone.

And, just so you know, I  try to keep V-girl in clothing....I really do....she just wants nothing to do with pesky things like shirts, pants, socks, etc.

My mom sent me this beautiful cup and saucer for Christmas...it was my Grandma's.

Speaking of Christmas gifts....I just realized that I never did a Christmas post and there are things that should be shared.....I got something that I have wanted/coveted for 20 or so years.  There was screaming and tears....by me....I acted like.....well, a kid, on Christmas morning!

My friend, Sherri, came over and helped me organize/declutter/rearrange my kitchen and garage.  Look!

We have a larger recycling bin since we always overflow ours....and we repurposed these shelves to hold some of the more seldom used kitchen-y things that I don't want to get rid of...but were taking up valuable cupboard space in the kitchen.  I am loving it.

Okay, I think that is enough random things for you this morning.  I will be back with a belated Christmas post, a New Year's wedding post,  and what photo evidence suggests....

some sort of scuffle in the basement....documented, apparently, by this person...

How Do You Do It All?

I hear that phrase quite a bit.  I heard it a lot more in Minnesota when I worked outside of the home....but I sill hear it in Georgia.

Because I have 6 kids.

Because I homeschool.

Because I cook for the family most nights.

Because I am involved in my church.

Because my kids are involved in lots of "stuff".

But, I have a confession to make.

I don't get it all done.

I do a pretty good job of keeping my kids and Rainman loved.

I do a pretty good job of keeping my kids and Rainman fed.

I do a pretty good job of getting the kids educated.

We are almost always on time for any appointment or commitment.

But, my house is a mess.

My stairs almost always hold enough clothes for all the neighborhood kids, as well my kids.

There are no words to describe this countertop.

Like my classy wine rack....full of stuff???

This is actually pretty contained and neat and pretty for us.  You would think about 20 people lived here based on the amount of shoes we have scattered near this shoe basket in our entryway.

I cannot remember the last time I actually truly mopped my floor.  I do spot cleaning when the kids spill stuff....but I haven't done a full all out mop in quite a while.

Gross, I know.

There are always crumbs on the floor....no matter how much we sweep or vacuum....some little person will come behind us and spill some cereal or crackers....and then, we are back at square one.

My mom really taught me better.

I have tried to follow Fly Lady.

I have gotten my sink all shiny.

I have tried to take care of my "hot spots".....but, to no avail....still a messy house.

I have tried having a container for mail and things that I don't know what to do with when they immediately come into the house.

I know.  It is a granola bar box....but still I had hoped it would contain things....as you can see...it didn't.  My laundry room is in the background....that is the place where people toss stuff that they don't know what to do with either....makes it hard to get in there and actually wash all those clothes that were left on the stairs!

I will try to do better.

I want to make my mother proud.

I want to have a peaceful, relaxing house for all of us to live in.

Maybe I will give Fly Lady another try.

I will keep you posted on my progress.

Are you somebody who does do it all?  Any advice for me on how to manage this?

I Need a Wife.

Recently, my Mother-in-Law came for a visit. 

I love my MIL.  I really do.  We never fight.  I only occasionally mumble things under my breath when she is around.  She loves my kids and doesn't seem to get overwhelmed by them as others are prone to....could be because she raised 7 kids and the last 2 were twins!

The things is, my MIL is in her early 80's and really hasn't slowed down much.  I think she finally stopped sitting on the floor to play games with my kids about a year ago.  Too hard to get back up.  I have that problem and I am half her age!  Anyway, it has become a joke, with the kids and I, before she comes, we have to have a "Grandma Ready" house.  What does that mean?

It means that the house is really clean...in addition to the normal sweeping, vacuuming, dusting stuff, there is nothing shoved under beds and hidden behind the doors....cupboards are wiped down....baseboards are wiped down.  Our goal is for Grandma not to have to do any cleaning when she is here.  If we didn't - that is really all she would do...."Just let me get down on my hands and knees and get those baseboards shining."  "I will sit down and relax after I Windex your T.V. screen."  "I just want to get that hardened crusty spaghetti sauce off the roof of your microwave."  All the motivation that the kids need is to remember that if there is something to be cleaned, Grandma will postpone playing games or reading the book until it is done.

I think you get the idea.  She wants to be helpful.  We want her to relax and have a leisurely visit.

On this last trip, she decided to cook and made some Polish/Slovak specialties for Rainman.  She made Halupky or Galumpky - depending on whether you are Polish or Slovak...and she made some noodles and dumplings.  My job was relegated to showing her where ingredients were located and sitting and visiting with her while she rolled the cabbage.

I cooked a few meals while she was here too, but it was so nice to have a break from being responsible for the meal....AND then to have a meal that wasn't frozen pizza or mac and cheese....it was a real, nummy, meal and I didn't have to make it.

As I mentioned already, my MIL hasn't really slowed down....which means she has a hard time sitting still.  So, even if the house is "Grandma Ready" and we are sitting down watching a show, when a commercial comes around, she takes a look around and finds something to get up and do - like pick up the dirty socks that have materialized on the living room floor....or toss the rogue Legos back into their bucket....or put the books back on the bookshelf.

It is actually a marvelous idea - but I never think of it.  If I am finally sitting down on the couch to enjoy watching Parenthood or The Middle or something....I am down for the count.  Lots of times, I even have the kids bring me my snack! 

I know!  Right?

But, you know what I noticed when she was here?  Everything stayed picked up.  It did not stay spotless.  She didn't have to "clean" anything, but, when we went up for the night, there weren't 10 billion little things laying on the floor that would be the first thing I would see as a descended the stairs in the morning.  The counters and table were wiped down -after meals AND after snack time.  The floor was swept more than once a day (which it really, really needs).

It got me to thinking. 

Boy, it sure would be nice to have a wife. 

Aren't we a cute couple?

Not that I want one of those Sister Wives situations, because I REALLY don't want to share Rainman - but, I can see the beauty in some of the day to day stuff....the cooking of "real" meals, just keeping things picked up, having someone to chat with while the cabbage is rolled, someone else to change the next stinky diaper....aahhh....yes....I can see the possibilities....