Changes That Didn't Happen

I alluded to some possible upcoming changes in one of my last posts.  One of them was the hopeful move to a new house, which I touched on in my last post about my life being paused.

I think the words I used were something like "potentially awesome and exciting, but nothing I could talk about yet."

But, I can talk about them now.

I am sure most of you know that Rainman and I have always been open to more kids, either biologically or by adoption.  The biological pathway seems to have expired with my advanced age.  LOL (although sometimes it doesn't seem so funny!)  Anyway, we have always said we were open to adoption possibilities, but wouldn't seek them out because of the expense involved in most adoptions. (seriously, it can cost between $20,000 and $50,000)

We have often joked about being totally okay if someone would drop a baby off on our doorstep, you know?

Over the years, we have had discreet inquiries from some of our friends about our willingness to adopt a baby from their young acquaintances.  We have always said an emphatic, "Absolutely!"  But, in the end, none of them have ever actually needed us.

The day we put our house on the market, I got another one of those calls from a friend asking if we would be at all interested in adopting twin little boys.  This time, I did not say my usual, "Absolutely!"  I asked if I could call her back after we talked as a family.  Twins are a bigger commitment from the whole family and would involve buy-in, and sacrifices, from everyone, not just Rainman and I.

The discussions between Rainman and I involved the difficulty of taking on twins in our "older" age and the financial burden of adding two more mouths to feed.

We have been taking care of twins for 2 days a week for friends of ours for the last 2 years or so. It is not like having our own set of twins 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but it gave us a taste of some of the blessings and challenges of dealing with two little people, and two sets of stuff, instead of just one at a time.

Ultimately,  Rainman and I decided that we would say yes, because we couldn't just be pro-life when it was easy, convenient and not scary.  We had a meeting with the kids and explained the phone call I had gotten.  There were various levels of excitement about the possibility of adding twin babies to our family.

Even those that weren't completely 100% excited about the possibility understood our reasons for wanting to say yes.

I called my friend back and said that our answer was, in fact, "Absolutely!"  Then, we waited....and waited.....and waited.

Nothing.

Somehow, this time had felt like it was going to be different.  I thought that the timing of getting the phone call the exact day our house was put on the market couldn't possibly be considered a coincidence.

When we were looking at the new house, we started planning for nursery space and how to baby proof the living areas.  The timing felt like it was meant to be.

I told my friend, that my "mommy switch" had gotten turned on and I couldn't stop thinking about those baby boys.  I knew that they were premature and in the hospital and if was going to be their mommy,  I wanted to be there holding them.  But, she hadn't heard anything more after she had passed along our information and told the family a little about our family.

Still nothing.

As time has passed, it has become clear that we were not needed to be the family of those little boys.  I will admit that even though it sounds crazy, I have grieved and cried that I wasn't going to get to be their mom.

My three youngest have been disappointed alongside me.  They love taking care of our little extras during the week, but were really looking forward to having babies around full time again.  V-girl REALLY wants to be a big sister.

Even though the thought of interrupted sleep and rear facing car seats made me pause a bit, I really wanted to love on those baby boys.

I had pictured our new family starting fresh in the new house on the lake.  But, then the second phone call about the babies never came and the phone call came from the realtor telling us that we had lost the lake house.  I was sad.  Deep down....sad.

Some of my "people" that I had shared the possibility of the adoption with understood, but some thought I should feel relieved that we hadn't adopted those babies.  I understood what they were saying and understood their hearts looking out for me, but, I will still admit to being sad.....whether it made sense or not.

It has been a hard winter/spring for me....mental health-wise.  Again though, I know a LOT of people have had it worse than me, but, it has been a tough one  with regard to maintaining my joy.  If that makes sense?

While all my sadness has been looming (under the surface most of the time) A-man, S-girl and V-girl have become obsessed with a song that plays on Christian radio here in Georgia.  It is a very catchy song and I would sing along to the chorus because I just couldn't help myself.  But, I didn't really listen to the words, if you know what I mean.  But, when I say the kids are obsessed, I mean, they listen to it all the time.  When they are having computer time and playing their various games or taking Sporcle quizzes, I would walk by and hear this song coming out of the speakers...or just hear them singing along to it.  They have figured out how to get the song to play on Spotify and they play it over and over.

So, one day I decided to find the official lyric video and see what exactly we were all singing along to.

I sat there amazed and feeling like God had once again used my kids to bring me blessings and speak to my heart.  I needed to hear this message this winter/spring...and maybe even summer.  I thought maybe you would too....

Not Just a Sunday Thing - Week 4

How is your daily time with Jesus going?  Like I said last week, I am definitely doing much better setting aside time to begin my day in peaceful quiet, prayer time.  It really does make a difference. But, like I also said last week, I am struggling to make it an organic part of my day and not just one more thing to successfully check off my "To Do" list.  The struggle is real.  Ha!

My Sunday School class just started the Jen Hatmaker book, For The Love.   My copy of the book hasn't gotten here yet, so I hadn't read the parts we discussed.  I just  joined in on the discussion from the other ladies in class that had already read it.  So, forgive me here for not being able to actually quote from the book.  But, my favorite part of our discussion today was when she talked about - unicorns.  Yes, I said, unicorns.

We were talking about balance.  Specifically balancing all the stuff in our lives.  She painted a picture of your life being a balance beam.  The more stuff you have piled on the beam, the harder it is to do your stuff......your gymnastic tricks.

Hey!  I found some Jen Hatmaker quotes on the GoodReads site!

"Balance. It’s like a unicorn; we’ve heard about it, everyone talks about it and makes airbrushed T-shirts celebrating it, it seems super rad, but we haven’t actually seen one."  

Hahahahahaha!

I totally got that.  I have talked before about the fact that so many people say things to me like, "I don't know how you do it all." Or...."You must have more patience that I do."  And, how it makes me laugh.

Balancing it all is just a magical figment of our imaginations.  A fictional being.

I can't do it all. (Neither can you.)

I certainly can't do it all at the same time.

I feel like today I can be a great wife and give myself heart, soul, and body to Rainman.

But, if I do that, I can't get a meal on the table.

If I get a good meal on the table, then, my house will be a mess.

If I have a clean house, then I am sure if I am not being a kind, loving mother.

I am starting to sound like If You Give A Mouse a Cookie.  Aren't I?

But, that is totally how it is in real life, for me.

Yes, I can multi-task, like a beast.

But, I cannot balance all the pieces of my life....well, I guess, more accurately, I can't balance the roles I play in life at the same time.

There have got to be seasons in your life where you have permission to focus more on certain areas. Where you allowed the luxury to focus on specific areas of your life.  Sort of like how we use winter for.....



You know what I mean, right?  The actual literal season of winter is used to take the focus off of our outward appearance and focus more on....say...making yummy food for our family.

I am not saying that if I have to shave my legs, my family doesn't eat.  But, I am saying when I can let go of some of those things (push them off my balance beam), I have time for other things.

Above all, we need to remember that the illusion of people really having it together and balancing it all are really just magical creatures we can call unicorns.  A nice fantasy, but NOT real.

My class this morning, talked about how bad social media can sometimes be.  People taking pictures of their kids after school snacks that are all Pinterest worthy.  People posting pictures of their happy, smiling family with no sullen teenagers in sight, or showing no signs of mom and dad snapping at each other right before the camera went - click.

Again, lots and lots of this stuff is just a magical, fictional creature.  Not real.

I love those memes that poke fun at the Pinterest snacks.  The "you nailed it" ones where they show the Pinterest inspiration photo and then the real life picture of someone recreating it.






It shows us a literal picture of "expectation" versus "reality".

We need to live in reality.

Not that we need to lower our expectations for our lives and be a pessimist.  But, we need to embrace the reality and not beat ourselves up over those things not living up to our expectations.  Because those things are just unicorns too.

And, I bet that funky looking train cake and the little evil, squashed face bunnies both tasted pretty good - despite how they looked.

This week I am challenging you to figure out what things in your life are really just  - unicorns.  What magical, fictional creature are you trying to make a reality.  Can you let go of it?  Does it make you feel like a failure because you can't achieve it?

Anybody want to share with the class what their personal unicorn looks like?

Not Just A Sunday Thing

I am going to try another new thing on my blog.  I am going to try to do a Sunday series that focuses on my faith.

Not Just a Sunday Thing.

My pastor used that phrase in his sermon this morning.

For some reason, his turn of phrase really jumped out at me.  I am sure he probably would have preferred that something else from his sermon have jumped out at me (since he was actually speaking about stewardship.  Hahaha!)

I actually did pay attention to the sermon as a whole too.  He spoke on Matthew 9:1-13 and Micah 6:6-8.  Even though I really was paying attention, I am not sure exactly where or what his point was about things being "Not Just A Sunday Thing."    He said that phrase and my head starting swirling around.   "I like that.  What a nice way to say that.  My faith shouldn't just be a Sunday thing."  Those kinds of things.  I did eventually bring myself back around to paying attention to what he was teaching, but I am still not sure how that phrase tied into his message or if it was just something he said that didn't especially have deep and powerful meaning for him!

Anyway, the bulk of his message was on the Micah scripture that talks about how we are supposed to give to the Lord.

Micah 6:6-8New Living Translation (NLT)

6 What can we bring to the Lord?
    Should we bring him burnt offerings?
Should we bow before God Most High
    with offerings of yearling calves?
7 Should we offer him thousands of rams
    and ten thousand rivers of olive oil?
Should we sacrifice our firstborn children
    to pay for our sins?

8 No, O people, the Lord has told you what is good,
    and this is what he requires of you:
to do what is right, to love mercy,
    and to walk humbly with your God.

I loved that my pastor pointed out that the prophet Micah was sort of exaggerating about what we were supposed to do in verses 6 and 7...sort of for dramatic effect.  In my mind though, I decided that Micah was being sarcastic.

You know, like a sarcastic teenager would have said it.....with an exaggerated eye roll....."sure.....we should offer 10,000 rivers of olive oil....."

Did sarcasm exist back in Bible times?  Hmmm...I wonder?

Anyway, it was a good sermon about giving of your best to God, in all things.  My Sunday School class dug into this a little more deeply and decided that it is really hard to give of your best all the time and that we have all, at times,  done a half hearted job at something and haven't been called out on it.

You know, done that "good enough" job with cleaning the house...or preparing supper....or lesson planning.

We talked about how rewarding it is when you actually do really do your best at something, and someone actually notices and pats you on the back.  It gives you a good feeling and makes you want to do you best more often..

Where my head went in this discussion that was those times when I do give it my all, try my hardest, give of my best....and nobody notices or cares....or pats me on the back for it.

Those are the hard times to keep giving of your best and not default back to just "good enough" or of the "What's the point?" type thinking.

I struggle with being good enough.  A good enough mom.  A good enough wife.  A good enough Christian.  I struggle with giving my best all the time.  I get lazy.  I get tired.


I even struggle with a basic Christian thing....prayer.  I know all about talking to God like he is your best friend, praying without ceasing and those verses about whenever two or more are gathered and all of that stuff.

Prayer is a good thing.  I know I should do it every day, every night, every moment.

You know what I mean, right?

I feel better when I pray.  I feel like I am really doing something when I pray for others.  For struggles that my friends and family are going through.  When I am trying to make a decision and really, really want to seek the Lord's guidance on what we should do.

But, sometimes....well....most times.....I am just too busy to offer more than a quick, "Lord, please help so and so....".

And, I will be honest here, when I go to bed at night, I just want to go to sleep, because I am tired.

I know that my life is blessed and that I have been blessed over and over again with my family, my husband, my beautiful children, my ability to homeschool the kids, the gift of being able to "just" be a stay at home mom when we moved to Georgia..

Blessing after blessing after blessing.

And yet, I still stumble into bed most nights and hope that Rainman isn't interested in anything other than sleep and that I can just roll over and go to sleep.  Many, many times, I don't even offer God and obligatory "Thanks for a good day" kind of prayer.

If I am worried about something or scared about something, I do seem to be able to find time to send my pleas up to God.

But, most times I just sleep.

That isn't giving of my best, is it?

That is using everything I have up and if I really need something, or if I have anything left over, then giving that to God.

Uggg.....if I think about that in a human to human relationship....man....I am a total jerk.  If this were a human to human relationship, I wouldn't want to be with that person. That is the kind of person that I warn my children against!

So, I need to figure out a way to give God my best....first.

For me,  I guess that means spending time with him right away in the morning, when I am fresh and before I have been sucked dry by this blessed life I am leading.

That sounds both easy and scary to me at the same time.  Pressure....even though I know it is the right thing for me to do...as a Christian....as a wife....as a mom.....as a broken sinner.  Which I am.  I am a broken sinner.  I can't just, as someone in my Sunday School class said....give God the top crust off my pie and move on.

We had been talking about tithing and giving your 10% to God.  Someone had said a former pastor years and years ago had recommended that you have your apple pie and you just cut off the top crust and give that to God right away.  You don't know what you are missing.  You still have a whole pie to yourself.  That kind of thing.

But, none of us really liked that thought process.  Because that way, God wouldn't get any of the warm, juicy fruit. Just the crust - which, let's be honest here isn't always light and fluffy and yummy. Sometimes, it is dry and tasteless, or kind of pasty and chokes you.....especially without the fruit.  Just the crust wouldn't be the best part of the pie.

I don't want to give God the dry, tasteless parts of my life.  I want Him to be present in all of it.  I want Him to get the best of me, since this life I am living is all because of Him....and it is Not Just a Sunday Thing.

You know?

So, I am going to take my own advice on eating the elephant one bite at a time and just aim for 5 minutes each morning that I really and truly just spend with God.  Hopefully, it will turn into more and hopefully I will actually crave that time spent with Him.  And, hopefully, in those 5 minutes, I will actually give of my best to Him, which will then be able to be turned back around to all areas of my life.

Hopefully.

Want to join me?

Want to commit to spending your first 5 minutes (after you have peed and all that stuff) giving of your best to God?

Thick Skin

I do not have thick skin.

Back in high school/early 20's, I wanted to be a Broadway actress/singer....or just a singer.  You know, a star!

I remember my dad cautioning me that it takes someone with very thick skin to pick that line of work.  It didn't take me long or too many local auditions/rejections, for me to realize how smart my dad was.

It takes very thick skin to put yourself out there for judgment from strangers.

I used to care a ridiculous amount what people thought of me.  What I wore.  What they thought about me wearing what I wore.  Whether that boy or that boy thought I was cute...or sexy....or stupid.  You know what I mean?

I have gotten better with age.

I care less what people think of me.

I mean, I know people think I am weird for homeschooling....and liking it.

I know people think I am weird for having 6 children....and wanting (even hoping for) more.

I know people think I am weird for the colors I paint on my walls in my house....and wanting just one more happy color in the room.

I know it.

I am able to laugh about it.  It doesn't keep me up at night.  It doesn't make me cry.

It is what it is....and that is okay.

But, recently, I accidentally got into what I am going to call a scuffle, on Facebook.

A family member's significant other had expressed outrage and anger over a recent current event.  I expressed my opinion....which happened to be different than theirs.

I wasn't mean.

I wasn't derogatory.

I wasn't harsh.

Really.

One of my things in life is that I always try to see the other guys side of the story.  Always.  It is one of my qualities that can drive Rainman crazy.

For example,say  there is someone driving under the speed limit.  Rainman has a tendency to get angry, perhaps he calls them..... Jack........explains to them where the accelerator is, and tells them to get off the road.  I, will be in the passenger seat saying things like, "Maybe they are lost." or "They are old."  or "Maybe they are sick and don't feel well."  You know, helping them to have a valid reason for their poor driving choices.

I really try to at least understand where people are coming from.....even if I don't agree with them.  On the flip side, I like to get people to see my side of things too.....even if they don't ever change their minds about it.

For instance, lots of people don't understand homeschooling as a valid educational choice.  But, I think, most people after talking to me and the kids, and getting to know us better, end up with at least a slightly better view of homeschooling than before.

So, when I made this comment on Facebook expressing my opinion, I was really just trying to let them see a glimpse of the "other side".

What I got in return was.......hmmmmm......I am still not sure exactly what to call it, but it felt awful.

It made me cry.

It made my heart race and my hands shake.

It made me sad.

It made me angry.

I was personally attacked for my opinion.  My level of education (or lack thereof, in their opinion) was attacked.  My religion was attacked.  My belief in God was attacked.  My intelligence (again....apparently the lack of it) was attacked.

I was attacked by the family members significant other.....and their cousin.  That is not even a euphemism. Literally, their cousin jumped in the argument with one goal in mind.....take me down.

My mom was actually on Facebook at the time and started a private conversation with me while the attack was going on.  She was shocked.  She kept saying, why are they attacking you? God? Christianity? Your intelligence?  You didn't say anything about that.  You didn't attack them.  You just expressed your opinion. Why are they being so mean?

I didn't have an answer.  I didn't know.

(The Taylor Swift song, "Why Ya Gotta Me So Mean?" did jump into my head though.)

Suddenly, I didn't feel like a confident 40-something woman who lived her life the way she wanted and didn't care what others thought.

My friend, Bruce and I have been friends since high school(really elementary school, but really got to know and like each other in high school).  He and I are on the opposite sides of the spectrum on most things....from religion to politics, and beyond.  We send each other articles to read to get the others opinion....because we know that we don't agree.  We want to know what the other thinks about different things and ideas. We have had some awesome discussions explaining our opinions to each other and why we feel that way.

After my scuffle on Facebook, I sent him a message thanking him for the respectful way he has treated me over the years in all of our discussions.  He has never once made me feel stupid...or as though he thought me and my opinions were stupid.  They were just different than his.  I didn't know how much I appreciated his friendship....even with all of our differences.... until I saw how it was on the other side.

Bruce was not only a State Champion on our high school's debate team, but he went on to be the National Champion, as well.  He can debate.  If he had wanted to, I am sure he could grind me and my opinions into the dust citing valid sources and references along the way.  He didn't do that.

There was definitely a reason that I was not on the debate team in high school.....because a girl who gets emotional and weepy when a debate turns ugly would not have been an asset to the team.

Whenever he and I were done with one of our little discussions, I never felt bad about myself.  I never worried that his opinion of my had changed.  It was just two people exchanging opinions and ideas. I never worried that he didn't like me anymore.

You see, I have a dirty little secret.

I like people to like me.

I am generally a positive, happy person that likes to see the best in people.  And, I usually can.  When someone else is mad at someone or talking bad about someone else, I am usually the annoying one in the corner saying stuff like, "Well, at least they are......(fill in the blank)"  I can almost always find something good and positive.

When I left this Facebook scuffle, I couldn't find anything good in either of the people that attacked me.  I thought horrible things about them.  I even said a few horrible things about them.

I actually felt a little physically sick from the whole situation.

I blocked any further conversation and notifications.  And, I made the decision to unfriend this individual.  I decided that I couldn't take on trying to make the "other side" understand me better, because that is not my gift.  And, that is okay.  There are probably people better suited to enjoying healthy debates like this (although this particular one was not a "healthy debate").  Bruce comes to mind.  I am not well suited for that. I am peacekeeper, at heart.

I actually did one of those little quiz thingies on Facebook the same day of the scuffle that was supposed to determine what my temper is.  It said mine was .....

Calm - You abhor anger and violence.  You have no respect for those who show negative emotions on a regular basis.  You value peace and harmony above all else.  You'd make a great parent or teacher.  You always try to see things from the others perspective.

If a Facebook quiz says it, then obviously it is true.  Right?  But, this one is right on the money.  I do value peace and harmony.  I do always try to see things from the others perspective.  I hate anger and violence.

I think that is what got to me the most....that the disagreements were hurled at me with such anger....and were directed at me, personally.

I have been thinking about expanding my blog a bit, getting more readers, maybe make a little money.  I have also been encouraged by numerous friends from different parts of my life, to consider writing a book.  ( Ever since my Sunday School class did the Bible Study called Discerning the Voice of God, by Priscilla Shirer - I pay attention when my life seems to be getting "thematic"....and people telling me to write a book keeps coming up.)

So, I have been thinking about it.  I have been praying about it.

But, this scuffle scared me.

I was really shaken up by the hatred these two people had for me and anyone who thought like I do.  It truly ruined my day....and even a little bit the day after.

Do I really want to open myself up for more of that hatred on a more popular blog....or as an author?

Could I handle it?

Then, this morning, my pastor preached a sermon that got to me.  It went along with our youth mission project this year, that finished up on Sunday.  The theme was called "Lord Make Me....." and their Bible verse of the week was Micah 6: 7-8.

Will the Lord be pleased with thousands of rams,
    with ten thousand rivers of olive oil?
Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression,
    the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?
8 He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
    And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
    and to walk humbly[a] with your God.

Throughout the week, the kids filled in their own words, like, Lord Make Me....Peaceful.....Thankful.....Loving.....pick an adjective....you get it.

When I was listening to the sermon, I thought....hmmm...that is nice....but it didn't really hit me hard.

Then Pastor Greg started talking about his dog, Samson.....who had just died the week before.  Stick with me, because this is when God started opening my eyes....via  slightly scary looking, biggest sweetheart of a dog you could ever meet, Samson.

Pastor Greg talked about being dependent on God and for our self worth and for who we are and not being distracted by the voices around us.  

He talked about taking Samson on walks through their neighborhood. They would walk by the other houses that had "little pocket dogs" that would bark at them through their fences. Samson was not distracted or deterred from walking by his side. He only gave them a passing look, because his importance, his identity, was found in him....Pastor Greg (his master)..... not the yippie little dogs.  

We should all be Samson, calmly and confidently walking by God's side.  

We aren't ignoring the things going on around us, but we aren't charging off to bark back at the little yippie dogs through the fence either. We aren't being drug back onto the path, only to be interrupted by another yippie dog on the next street....and for the drama to start up all over again.  

We are just walking along with our Master.

Depending on God for our identity, not the world.

I know that in my mind.

I know that in my heart.

Doing it, though, seems hard.

I began to think....hmmm....I wonder if that is how Billy Graham operates....or ....pick a president....any president.

I have always just thought that those types of public people were built differently than me and that people saying mean things about them just didn't matter to them.  That they were just so supremely confident, that what the masses said, didn't hurt them or bother them.

I imagine that is somewhat true....and that they, like my dad would say, have much thicker skin than me.....but, maybe they really just have a higher calling,  a true purpose. They are following their master....in Billy Graham's case....God....and his opinion and voice is the only one that matters.   

They are Samson.

Can I do that?  Can I be Samson?

Last night, I read J-girl's latest blog post called Confidence for One, Please.  In it, she talks about how she let  her insecurity and low self esteem steal something that she was excited about.

I wonder how often that happens to us in life.

I know I have done it.

I still sometimes do it, as a 40 something grown up.


I was letting insecurity and, in my case, fear of attack, steal a chance to try something new and potentially exciting from me.

So, I  have come to the reason for this long and somewhat rambling post.

I am going to try to really and truly only listen to my master, God.

I am going to try hard not to care if people say mean things about me, or my choices.  (I may not get into anymore scuffles on Facebook though.....I am considering those my "yippie dogs".)

I will try to grow some slightly thicker skin.

I am going to write a book.

I don't know what kind of book.

But, God is getting thematic with me.

I am going to be Samson.....

...... and just calmly listen to my master.....and walk by his side, knowing that I will be fine wherever He leads me.

On that note, anyone have any book topic ideas in mind for me?

What kind of book would you read, with me as the author? 

VBS Hangover

I have a VBS hangover.



In my wild and crazy life, that is the only kind of hangover I have these days.

Honestly, it doesn't depress me much.

The few times I did have an actual, old-fashioned kind of hangover was enough for me.

I am sure I have shared before that I have a love/hate relationship with VBS.

I have been in charge of music for the past few years.

I love it.  The kids are adorable.  The little ones trying to match my dance moves is adorable.  Their cute little voices singing (sometimes shouting) along is adorable.  It is fun. They are happy to see me (except sometimes the 5th grade boys aren't so thrilled with me).  I get lots of spontaneous hugs.  Introducing 106 little people to the fact that Jesus loves them and wants to work with them in their lives is fantastic.

I hate it too.  There are 106 little people talking when you are trying to teach.  There are 106 little people with different personalities and needs.  By the end of the week, there are 106 tired and cranky little people just waiting for the opportunity to have a meltdown.

It is exhausting.  Sure, I get my exercise from doing the dance moves and jumps over and over.

But, it is mentally exhausting too.

You see, I am, in fact, an introvert.

I can be an extrovert, when needed.

VBS is one of those times where being an extrovert is an advantage.

So, I pull out my latent extrovert tendencies.  I have them.  They are there deep inside of me.

I can pull out the frustrated actress in me.

The problem is that I get wiped out after my 3 hours of VBS.

By the end of the week, I have had a blast with these 106 little people and my brain is in a fog from having to be the bubbly, perky music director.  You know?

So, this week, life it back to normal at our house.

The house is a real mess, because last week when we walked in the door, I would announce to everyone that I didn't care what they did, as long as it was quiet.  I even encouraged them.....yes....encouraged them....to watch t.v......as much as they wanted.

That meant that the house fell apart around my ears....and I hardly cared.

But, this morning I care.....but, I have a VBS hangover, so I am moving in slow motion, clutching my head and wondering why the arches of my feet are still so sore.

But, I have made a start.

I have made lists.

Lots and lots of lists.

Lisst for me.

Lists for the kids.

I am going to be happy with that.

Lists are good.

Plans are good.

Coffee is really good.

Now, I just need a few of Rivet's arms and I will be good to go.

Beauty in the Heart

This is a review.



We received an e-book Bible study from Doorposts, called Beauty in the Heart.  Beauty in the Heart is a Bible study designed by Pam Forster, for girls, ages 10-12 and up and focuses on Godly beauty.

I really wanted to try this out with both A-girl (13) and L-girl (11), because as all girls this age, they are becoming more and more interesed in the look that they are presenting to the world.  I am finding myself saying all those things my parents said to me about my looks:  You don't need to paint yourself up to look pretty.  Is that what you are going to wear?  Aren't those a little tight/short/lowcut?

We have talked about modesty.  We have talked about inner beauty.  And, I have gotten eyerolls.

So, when we got the chance at this Bible study that I could do with them and not just preach at them, I was excited.  I will be honest, they were not excited when I presented it to them.

We did this after our family Circle Time with just the three of us.  There are 10 Chapters:

1.  Beauty in Submission

2.  Beauty in the Heart

3.  Beauty in Trusting God

4.  Beauty in Humility

5.  Beauty in Modesty

6.  Beauty in Serving

7.  Beauty without Discretion

8.  Beauty in Crisis

9.  Beauty in the Gates

10. Beauty in Review

There is a little section at the end that has "alternate" questions for young men, but there is a Bible study that Doorposts has that is geared towards young men - that might be better suited to them.

Each study is divided in 7 day cycles for the Bible study assignments.  Some were easier than others, so we usually grouped 2 or 3 days together at a time.

This is not a shallow, breezy devotional or Bible study.  It is deep and intense.  It takes some real soul searching.  It takes deep reading of the Bible stories of Godly women, like Esther, Sarah,  and Ruth.

This Bible study clarified for me why my parents said the things they did to me....and why I am following in their footsteps in preaching it to my daughters.  It made me look closer at some familiar Bible stories.  Honestly, this study made me think a little differently about Abraham and the time he pretended that Sarah was his sister. (Genesis 12: 10-20)   



I have decided that it is really difficult to "review" a Bible study.  Because the information ends up being so personal and different for everyone that works through it.

This is one of those studies that probably ended up speaking more to me, at this point, than them.  I think to them, it ended up just being more of the stuff mom has been saying to them already....but they don't really want to hear it.  Their hearts aren't quite soft enough yet to really understand that Beauty in the Heart is really what will attract people to you.  But, I know that is planted seeds in their hearts.  I know it.

Although, at this point, I think the Introduction to the book was what was the most clear to them.  Its main points were:

Most women are interested in being pretty and there is nothing wrong with looking your best.  God is, in fact, the one who made beauty....so he wants you to understand what true beauty is and where it comes from.   This study works to teach what God says about beauty in the midst of a beauty obsessed world.

The other thing I thought this study was good at was really creating a way to really study scripture.  The author does this by comparing scripture passages, encouraging the use of a concordance, studying the people in the Bible and their actions and choices.  It really encourages digging for the answers.  Even in some cases going back to the original Hebrew and Greek works and how they are used in different situations throughout the Bible.

The author suggested having Nave's Topical Bible and Strong's Exhaustive Concordance handy to use in conjunction with the study.  We did not have Nave's Topical Bible, but we do have Strong's Concordance, which has helpful.

Also, this study uses King James Version of the scriptures, but I am not a big fan of that so we looked up everything in the New International Version.  The author also suggests marking certain passages and verses in your Bible and even in some instances color coding them.  If you have an issue with writing in your Bible, you could skip these steps in the study.  My dad wrote all over his Bible and in almost every margin....so writing in ours wasn't a big deal. 

Some pages have little gray boxes with additional things to study, for example, in the chapter covering the themes in 1 Peter 2:11-3:9, she suggests studying the life of Jesus, especially his last day and how He responded to those who wronged him.  See?  Not a light, fluffy Bible study.  Another gray box suggested using an on-line parallel Bible to compare translations of the same verse.

Here are some sample pages from the book, so you can get a flavor of the information and the way it is presented.

I, personally liked this study (even though it was a lot deeper than I thought it was going to be) and hope that I at least planted seeds in my daughters of what true Godly beauty means.  That beauty is a good thing when it isn't taken to extremes like they are seeing in the world today.

The Beauty in the Heart Bible study is available in hard cover and e-book form.  If you hurry, you can use  the coupon "beautystudy" in your shopping cart to get a free instant-download PDF copy of the Bible study when you pre-order the paperback (Print books will ship by 8/29. Special ends 8/31).  The paperback is available for $14.00.

The TOS Reviewers also got a chance to review a Bible study for guys called Because You Are Strong.  Go take a look and see what the other TOS reviewers thought of the Bible studies. 

Still Here

Yup.

We are still here.

On Monday, we thought we had 2 offers coming in.  We were jubilant.  We were relieved.

Now, it is Friday and we have had no offers.  Still waiting to hear back from one buyer who is mulling over our unofficial counter offer (which really was a horrible counter offer from us - because we still lose money...but it was better than their unofficial lowball offer).  The other buyer says that they are still interested but wanted to run things by their lender - who is on vacation until tomorrow, apparently.

Then we had a showing scheduled for yesterday, by an out of town buyer....in town for one day to look at 11 houses.  We were 11th on the list.  I was sort of excited because I thought we would make a great finish to their day....and maybe....just maybe, we would have an offer put in front of us before they headed back out of town.  That is how we did it when we moved here....we flew in, looked at houses and then filled out paperwork for make an offer on our way to the airport again that afternoon.

But, of course, the showing yesterday never came.  They never called.  They never contacted us.  My poor kids had cereal for dinner because I didn't want to make a mess of the kitchen, because I was sure that they would be calling at any minute telling me they were on their way.

I was scolded earlier this week by a real estate agent for only offering a 2% commision to the buyer's agents.  She was sure that is why my home hasn't sold, because agents are steering people away from my house.  I don't think that is true since we are at about 40 showings for our house.  But, she made me mad. 

I know I am supposed to remove my emotional involvement and think of this as a business deal....but, I am so hoping that someone else comes in and buys the house so she cannot get the $4,000+ in commission she will be paid if her buyer takes the house.  Does that make me a bad Christian?

I have been pretty upset about all of this and questioning our decision to even put the house on the market.  Rainman and I have prayed every step of the way through this process....and, this week, I have been questioning whether we really heard God's prompting and guidance in all of this....or if we just pushed through our own agenda....and, I was making myself sick with worry.  I am really not normally a worrier...that is my Mom's job!  But, I was even having chest pain/tightening and couldn't seem to turn off my mind and its whirling thoughts of what do to.

I was praying as I unloaded the dishwasher yesterday and was sort of whining and crying out to God...."I wish you would just tell me something!  I wish I knew if we were wrong to start this process!  What are we supposed to do?  Are we supposed to take a loss on this house?  Then we won't have any money for the downpayment on the other house and will have to borrow the whole amount, plus enough to pay off our existing loan!  What are we supposed to do?"

You get the idea.  I was whining.

This is where I used to rely on my Dad.  If I felt like we needed clarification on something.  I would call my Dad.  He would pray about it.  Sometimes he didn't get any clear message from God to pass along to us, but, many times he would.  He would, I think, remove himself as my father and just sort of pass along the note from God for us.....because just couldn't seem to hear Him ourselves.

But, Dad has been gone almost 2 years now.

So, as I was stacking dishes in the cupboard and scraping the crunchy gunk that always seems to be on the bottom on our cups off, I clearly heard God say, "Ask Brian."

Brian, is a friend of mine from high school, that now owns an engineering firm in northern Minnesota, is heavily involved with local youth, and is a fabulous nature photographer via Chasing the Wind Photography.



Here is what part of his "mission statement" for Chasing the Wind Photography....

All too often we find ourselves searching for something or someone that will bring "true happiness" to our lives. Have you ever said, "I just want to be happy"? We are so busy trying to fill ourselves with "stuff" that we think will make us happy, only to be disappointed. How many of those people around you seem to be trying to fill themselves up with something that they think will make them happy? Maybe it's a new boy or girlfriend, maybe a new car, a new house, a different job, or more money? Maybe it's not possessions at all. Maybe it's drugs or alcohol? Perhaps it's something that looks much better, such as helping others? Yes, we can even try to fill ourselves up by trying to get others to praise our efforts. Different things for each one of us I suppose. We are all searching for something. Quite often the "something" changes as we grow older. The happiness that a new bicycle brings at age 7, can't be purchased so cheaply when you're 37. We get so wrapped up in our search for happiness and the cluttered nature of our daily lives, that we often forget to slow down and enjoy the simple gifts that surround us.

Clutter in our lives isn't a new concept. Even King Solomon, one of the richest and wisest men of his time, concluded, in his late years, that "Everything is meaningless, like chasing after the wind" (Ecc. 1:14 NIV)......

.....It is amazing how many of us spend the majority of our lives searching for the very love and happiness that God gives us freely. A simple gift from him to each one of us.
I left a chunk of his biography/about us page out....so, feel free to go read it in its entirety (by the way, all proceeds from his photos go to fund wilderness trips for youth)





Brian and I were probably more acquaintances in high school and just sort of traveled in similar circles.  But, we have come to know each other better via FB.  Anyway, I thought it was a strange thing....but, I was absolutely, 100% certain that I heard God prompting me to "Ask Brian".

So, I did.  I started out my message on FB with...."This is going to sound strange, but....." I briefly explained the situation and asked him to pray and see if he got any secret messages from God for Rainman and I.

Here was his response:

God is so amazing. I prayed and 2 things came to me almost immediately. I will continue to pray but will share what I believe that I was lead to share. -Glorify him in all that we do. Are your decisions going to glorify God or you? This seems to be harder for men I think but its what I heard. -Do not worry. He loves you more than you can imagine and will take care of you and your family. You just need to trust that he hears your prayers and doesn't want you to worry. Trust that he will lead the way. Just give it to him. He blessed you with some wonderful children and that's where your energy and emotion should be rather than things which are out of your control. That's it. I will add this. His timing is often different than mine. The verse "be patient and wait on the lord" rings in my ears a lot. Smile! God will take care of it!

I thanked him and sent a message back that said something about how I think a lot of my worrying (in addition to the financial piece) was for the people we were buying the house from, because they want to be in their new school district when school starts...which, here in Georgia is the first week of August.  I didn't want our situation to put their lives on hold. I told him that I was just going to meditate on how much God loves me and making the human nature part of me just leave it alone....and really just trust in God.

His response:

 I struggle with that same thing many days! then I close my eyes, listen to the birds or wind and know that he is here with me, and it is going to be OK.

So, if you need me, I am going to be outside, with my eyes closed.....listening to the birds and wind and knowing that He is God...and He has got my back.

All pictures (except my house) are courtesy of Brian Grund and Chasing the Wind Photography, Bemidji, MN.

Nothing New

I thought I would report to you that there is nothing new going on here.

We are still trying to sell our house.

My house is still clean most of the time.  (It really is sort of a wonderful thing.)

We have had 28 showings.

We have had 0 second showings.

The feedback we have gotten is that our backyard and kitchen are beautiful, but the house is too small.  (I can't really fault those reasons, since that is pretty much how I feel about the house too.  Although, I thought that the reason I felt it was small was because there are 8 of us living here....I figured a "normal" sized family wouldn't think it was small!)

We are finishing up our school year.  Everyone except A-girl is done for the year.

I can't do any planning for next year because all of my school stuff is packed away to make it look like a homeschooling family with 6 kids doesn't live here.

Since my house is always about 15 minutes away from being clean, I don't have a lot to do around here.  (Sort of a crazy feeling that I could really have company over at the drop of a hat....and they could visit every level of our house and I wouldn't have to be mortified...not even once!)

I have banned the children from eating or snacking in areas of the house that are carpeted.  They are miserable and whiny.

I have learned that I really like having my bed made....something Rainman and I never, ever used to do. (Aren't you proud of me, Mom?)

I am sort of stuck in limbo physically and mentally.  Not enjoying that at all.

I am trying to have faith in God's timing as we have found a house we really love and our contingent offer has been accepted....but nothing can happen for us....or the other home owners, until our house sells. 

I lay this at God's feet about 10-12 times a day.  Why so many times?  Because I keep picking it back up and walking away with it to worry over.....so, back it goes with my apologies to Him.

If you are the praying sort, please pray for our whole housing situation and that we will be financially ready and mentally ready when everything falls into place.

Mostly Better....I Think....

Okay, I am feeling better.  Not quite so whiny. So, it is safe for you to come back.

I think it is safe to say I was just a little overwhelmed with life and "stuff", but I have lived long enough to know that it was going to be a temporary situation.  Just like those times when I am mad at Rainman.  It passes.  It is temporary.

Last week, we started back to school and D-man started at his new school.  So, my real work started back up, so I had to at least try to get out of my slump....and I did.

But, this is what really kicked my butt out of the serious whinies....

Really?  How can you feel the least bit sorry for yourself after watching that?  You can't.  You realize that you are loved by God.  That you are fearfully and wonderfully made and that you have choices....no matter the "hand" that you were dealt.

So, that one kicked my butt into gear.

Also, one of my friends was decluttering and brought in a stack of books to our Sunday School class that she just wanted gone.  I randomly reached into the stack and brought out this thin, little book.



I started flipping through and knew that God had arranged for this book to be available for me on that day.

It has great little sections for what you may be going through and then a few Bible verses to help encourage you.

Like the section called Help!  I Am Overwhelmed!

They have subtitles like:

When I feel like giving up.....

When my life is changing....

When my finances are a mess....

When I am totally exhausted....

or the section called Getting Through the Day:

That has subtitles like:

When I need to set priorities....

When I need to be realistic....

When I need to recognize my talents....

When I should compromise....

When I need to say no....

When I must stop comparing myself to others....

When I want to make a plan....

It is a skinny little book that packs a powerful punch.  It has encouraged me and comforted me by reminding me of God's love for me and that he knew I was going to occassionally get discouraged and feel overwhelmed.

 He knew. 

He cared.

He had my friend declutter just when I needed this little book.

So, yes.  I am better.  No more therapy session posts.  Let me know if you need a few encouraging Bible verses to get you through.  I will check my little book and get back to you!

I may not be very whiny anymore, but.....I am getting to be a bit crochety though....not crochet-y....(although...speaking of crochet....look what I made last week!)

(It is a scarf, by the way....and I actually used knitting needles, not a crochet hook....just looking for a chance to brag apparently!)

Anyway....back to being crochety for a bit....

I find myself bewailing the way kids have things these days.  Like, when I found out that elementary aged kids are getting Ipads sent home with them to do their school work.  Seriously...elementary kids.  Ipads.  Sent home to be their's for the year.  I mean, really?  Aren't schools in a budget crisis or something?  Is there really something wrong with completing homework on paper?  I am not asking for a comeback of the slate tablets that Laura Ingalls Wilder used....but, come on!  Don't even get me started on hand held video games.

I think I am turning into Maxine.


Source - http://www.quotesworthrepeating.com/maxine-quotation-gallery/maxine-words-to-live-by/

Deep Blue Bible

Who knew that you could review something like the Bible?  Not me.

But, it has been fun.

We have quite a few Bibles already floating around our house.  But, it was nice to get a Bible designed for kids.  And, I really liked that it was in Common English....so much easier to understand...even easier than my New International Version.



The Bible is published by Abingdon Press and is called the Deep Blue Bible.

I made L-girl and A-man share the Bible (since it has a target audience of about age 7-12)....but though they both wanted it all to themselves.  The campaigning started out quite civil with both sides presenting their case as to why they should be the one that got the new Bible.  I am sad to say that the fighting ending in a very "non-Christian" way.

So, now they have shared custody of it....although I think L-girl came out on top in the amount of usage.  A-man is easily distracted. 



The Bible we got has a flexible cover....not a paperback cover, which I like....hard cover books and Bibles always seem to fall apart at our house and paperback covers get ripped off, never to be found again.  This one has held up well.

So, onto the actual book.

Amazingly, I didn't have any trouble with the content of this book, AND, I actually agreed with everything the authors had to say!    Ha!

Obviously, the basic content of the Bible is the same....although the Common English is really a great, easy to understand version.

The ways that this Bible is set apart from other kids Bibles is the little thingies scattered throughout.

Like the "Did You Know?" trivia tidbits.

They also have little.....hmmmm.....personal challenges....or thinking assignments throughout....I mean other than the personal challenges that the Bible assigns to us anyway.

There are the Umbrellas.....

Lighthouses....

Life Preservers.....

And, there are sailboats......

 
So, what do all those "nautical/don't get wet" metaphors mean?

I asked L-girl to clarify them for me, and here are her responses:

The Umbrellas are notes that give help for different times and that explain that unhappy emotions aren't good for us. 

The Lighthouses are notes that help us grow into a rock solid faith with God right there in our lives.

The Life Preservers are notes that give us answers to tough questions and things that may be hard to understand in the Bible.

The Sailboats are notes to help us grow strong with God by pointing out good traits in our lives.

My personal favorite part of this particular Bible is the "I Wonder What To Do When...." section at the back.

See?  You can look up verses and passages that will help you when you are afraid, or depressed, or feeling guilty.  There are different sections for the Umbrellas, Lighthouses, Sailboats, and Life Preservers too.

The other thing that this Bible has is "I Bet You Can..."  reading challenges. 

 

This particular one is Ezekiel 43: 1-27 and the "bet" is that you can read it in 8 minutes.  L-girl is very competitive...even with herself.  She has done some of them already, but, I can see her going through the back of the book where all of these challenges are listed, getting the timer and just checking them off as she beats the clock.

One of the last unique parts of this Bible are the "Gods Thoughts....My Thoughts" sections.

These require some thinking, and are really what I would call devotionals.  Like the one called, "How Do We Follow God Today? which is based on Numbers 9:15-23.  There are a few paragraphs about the story from the Bible, ans then little examples of where the Bible has given us clear examples of what we should do....don't lie....don't steal...be kind and compassionate.  Then, it goes on to tell them that each specific situation they may face won't be talked about in the Bible, but that we can still use it to guide and direct us.  Each one of these Gods Thoughts My Thoughts sections ends with some questions to think about and answer honestly. 

Again, all of these sections (Gods Thoughts....Umbrellas, etc.) have a portion in the back of the book, so they are easy to find....especially if you are struggling with a specific issue in your childs life.  Are they feeling harassed at school?  There is a section for that.  Are they wondering why animals were sacrificed?  There is a section to help answer that question.  Are they stressed out?  There is a section of Bible verses for that.  (Honestly....I could see myself using this Bible sometimes just for those easy to find things.)

This Bible would be a great gift to give to a child and just let them explore on their own.  My church gives away Bibles once the kids hit 3rd grade....this would be the perfect Bible for that....because it isn't a babyish kids Bible.

This Bible would also be an awesome one for you to explore with your children.  Like I said, I really liked the Common English and I loved the reference area at the end that was in wording that I get...."stressed out"...."feeling harassed"...."feeling ungrateful".  I get those.  I can relate to those.  I need encouragement about those things.

This would even be a good gift for someone who already has a Bible.  I mean it when I say this Bible is really easy to understand...and, I would consider buying it for the reference section at the back alone.

You can get a copy of the Deep Blue Kids Bible from a couple of places. But, the cheapest places I found were Cokesbury who has it for $17.00 right now (as I write this) and at Amazon for $17.91. 

See what others on the TOS Review Crew thought about Abingdon Press' Deep Blue Kids Bible.



Disclaimer:  We received a copy of the Deep Blue Kids Bible for free, in exchange for an honest review.

Judah Bible Curriculum

We have been reviewing another Bible curriculum around here.  I recently told you about this one. 

 Now we are working on Judah Bible Curriculum, an on-line curriculum.



My Dad would have really liked this one.

From their website:

The Judah Bible Curriculum is a "Principle Approach" ( Principle Approach refers to a philosophy of education whose content and methods are designed to build character in teacher and student capable of sustaining liberty) Bible curriculum whose distinctives are the following:

• The BIBLE is the textbook. The student studies and learns the Bible.
• The student learns God's purpose in history, studying the hand of God in the lives of men and nations through the Bible.
• The student develops his reasoning ability, helping him to apply Biblical principles personally.
• The curriculum helps you shift from rote learning to Biblical reasoning.
• The student learns the relationship between the sovereignty of God and the personal responsibility of the individual.
• The student learns the relationship between individual character and national liberty

I have never heard of the Principle Approach before, so all of this was new to me.

Here are some things that the author wants you to keep in mind as you use this curriculum:


1. The hand of God in History
2. The hand of God in the life of the individual
3. Christian self-government
4. Individual Christian character and national liberty

So, how did it work at our house?

It was good....and, not so good. 

I love that it uses the Bible as the text. 

But, on the down side, it was a lot of work for me.

To get me started, I got a 100-page K-12 Manual download as well as 8 hours of audio lessons in mp3 format for me to listen to. So, I read the manual and then logged onto their website and listened to some audio recordings that you are supposed to listen to before jumping into the curriculum.  (I did not listen to all 8 hours of lessons.)

Around here, it is really hard for me to listen to....or watch anything uninterrupted.  So, that in itself was a challenge. 

I think the basic point was to teach me, as a student, first....so, then I could turn around and teach my kids.  But, it was just harder than I thought it would be.....or maybe I should say, harder than I needed it to be.....right now.

I did pick up some interesting things from the audio training:

The job of the Home is to train your character.

The job of your Church is to train your conscience.

The job of the Government is to protect individual liberty and property.

This course focuses on 5 themes and what is happening governmentally throughout the Bible.

The five themes are:
1.  Creation
2.  Redemption
3.  Kingdom of Israel
4.  Kingdom of God
5.  Early Church

The goal of this type of curriculum is to help students learn how to extract material from the text. (A good thing for any subject, in my opinion)

Do not ask what the author wants me to do, but what does God want me to do.

Again, I think this was designed so, first, the teacher learns how to dig deep and delve into the Bible....and then, in theory, inspires that same goal of digging deep and delving into the Bible in my children.

Click here if you want to know Judah Bible Curriculum's Statement of Faith.

Here is a video clip explaining what they call  the "American Philosphy of Government" used in this curriculum. Based on the idea that there are three philosophies of government.  God is sovereign, the State is sovereign,   and the individual is sovereign.  This is also based on the idea that we all have our own  philosphy of government and that is what guides our education....one of of the three directions.....God is sovereign.....the State is sovereign.....or the individual is sovereign......which then forms our ultimate character. 



Make sense?

I think it will after you watch this video.

This curriculum also provides basic worksheets called Key Sheets that outlines a few "key"....

1.  Events
2.  People
3.  Institutions
4.  Documents

.....in the different passages of study......for each theme.

Each "key" is studied with a view towards identifying the hand of God, the character of God, and the place of that key in His purpose for history.

You focus on one key each week starting with the Bible.  Then, you expand that and use commentaries, concordances, Bible handbooks, Bible dictionaries, maps, timelines, encyclopedia, and other reference material you may find.  

You also include memory verses in your lessons.  For littler kids, you can include coloring pages and simpler activities.  The students (and the teacher) also keep a Bible notebook of information that they are studying, notes to themselves, memory verses, etc. 

From their website:

 The purpose of the notebook is to produce something of value and develop character qualities of creativity, productivity, excellence and organization, to be a producer not a consumer. The purpose is production, not paper storage.

There is a Scope and Sequence where they have spelled out how to divide the studies up in different grades. 



Okay, here is the part where I make a confession.

I like a curriculum where I don't necessarily have to think.....or put a lot of prep time into preparing lessons.

There, I said it.

I know. 

When we are talking about Bible, it seems kind of lazy for me to complain about having to do work so we can study the Bible.

But, that is sort of what I am doing......complaining.....well, maybe not complaining.  It is probably more like whining.

I said right away that I know my Dad would have loved this curriculum.  It was the kind of Bible study he did.  Deep.  Well thought out.  Using all sorts of other historical information to bring meaning and understanding to the scriptures.

He spent a lot of time studying the Bible.  A lot.  He had notes, cross references, and lines on probably every single page of his Bible.

So, while I loved the idea of this curriculum in theory.  It didn't work so much in my everyday life.....maybe because we have 6 kids.  I think it would have been easier to manage with a smaller household.

But, most likely it just didn't work for us because of  selfish reasons.  I didn't take the time to delve into it like I should have so the kids and I could have dug through the Bible bit by bit together.  We just sort of scratched the surface and I felt like I was missing the point.

I also think that I had problems doing that because we are in the middle of a school year.  My plan, right now, is that I will take some time this summer and see if I can't get a better handle on Judah Bible Curriculum philosophy and approach, and decide how I can lay it out for our family before our structured classes begin next year.

I think we may have a shot at it succeeding that way.

So, if I haven't scared you off and you are interested in checking this out, here are the prices:

A hard copy is available for $69.00, plus 5.00 shipping and handling    Total $74.00.
   
 For that price, you get:
1) Judah Bible Curriculum K-12 Manual;
2) Elementary Notebook Ideas booklet;
3) Eight-lecture Teacher Training Seminar on CDs.

(I think I may have done better with the actual hard copy.  There is something about pouring through a manual that you can't get pouring over one on your screen.)

Or, you can get on-line access/ebook:  Total $44.00.   

For that price, you get:
1) Judah Bible Curriculum K-12 Manual, e-book format to download;
2) Elementary Notebook Ideas booklet to view online or download;
3) Eight-lecture Teacher Training Seminar. listen online or download.

I think this curriculum would work well with a parent who has the time to follow through with all the prep material before jumping into it.  I haven't given up yet.  Like I said, I love the idea of this curriculum, but felt unprepared and like I was missing things because of the way I sort of shoved it into the middle of our school plans.

Go see what other TOS reviewers thought of the Judah Bible Curriculum.



Disclaimer:  I received on-line access to the audio lessons, and the downloadable Judah Bible Curriculum manual for free in exchange for an honest review.